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这篇文章的共同创作者是 Kate Dreyfus. Kate Dreyfus是Evolve and Empower的所有者、整体恋爱教练和直观治疗师。她从业逾10年,擅长跨国婚介、以心为本的治疗、恋爱指导和赋权指导。Kate获得了亚利桑那大学的心理学文科学士学位。她也是生物场协会、治疗之触专业协会和能量疗法专业协会的会员。
本文引用了13条参考,详情参见页面底部。
这篇文章已经被读过5,471次。
“不联系”法则的重点是给自己时间理清前任带给你的混乱、迷惘的感觉。基本上,你需要跟前任断绝所有联系,在社交媒体上屏蔽对方,拉黑他们的手机号码,不要联系对方,给自己独处的时间和空间好好疗伤,放下这段感情继续前行。但是,到底要过多久才会开始好受一些呢?你需要多长时间才能再次坦然地跟前任交流?下面会告诉你各种情况的具体断联时间。
步骤
- 确保对方已经有了巨大的改变,才重新联络他们。跟对你不好的情人分手后,最好的做法是放下这段感情,继续正常生活。但是,如果你过了很久以后 真的很想联系对方,先观察他是否已经有了巨大的改变。如果他们经常酗酒,那就确保对方有在接受戒酒治疗。如果他们过去经常辱骂你,那么他们应该上愤怒管理课程。如果对方对你不好又拒绝改变,不要回到他们的身边。[9]
- 这可能需要很多年的时间。不管你有多想,都不要那么快联络待你不好的前任。
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- 如果你想要挽回前任,试着在1-2周后联系对方。有些人在分手后运用“不联系”法则来挽回前任。这是很好的做法,特别是如果前任对是否要分手犹豫不决。等待1-2周,给前任一些时间意识到自己的生活没了你有多空洞。然后,给他们发消息或打电话,看看他们过得怎么样。[10]
- 如果他们在这期间主动联系你,告诉他们你还要一些时间弄清楚自己想要什么。这种做法向对方表明了你还在衡量自己的选择,他们可能会更想要把你追回来。
- 断联期结束后,重新联系对方时,保持从容淡定的态度。慢慢来,不要急。向对方强调你在断联期间跟其他朋友玩得很开心。别让对方觉得他们掌控着局面,但也不要让他们感到毫无希望。毕竟只有前任后悔分手,你才能成功跟对方复合。如果你直接就倾诉自己的生活没了对方有多空洞,他们可能不觉得自己像你需要他们一样需要你。[11]广告
参考
- ↑ https://undoabreakup.com/30-day-no-contact-rule/
- ↑ https://lovesagame.com/no-contact-rule/
- ↑ https://f01.justanswer.com/11012014Jah/ca302468-ee3b-4d77-866c-643adf207f84_therulesofnocontact.pdf
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
- ↑ https://exgirlfriendrecovery.com/how-long-should-i-do-the-no-contact-rule/
- ↑ https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/the-true-meaning-of-the-no-contact-rule/
- ↑ https://exbackpermanently.com/the-no-contact-rule/
- ↑ https://www.discovermagazine.com/mind/your-brains-response-to-your-ex-according-to-neuroscience
- ↑ https://www.revelist.com/real-talk/real-reason-you-get-over/2211/the-attachment/3
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