This article was co-authored by Jay Reid, LPCC and by How.com.vn staff writer, Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA. Jay Reid is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC) in private practice in San Francisco, CA. He specializes in helping clients who have survived a narcissistic parent or partner. Treatment focuses upon helping clients identify and challenge self-diminishing beliefs as a result of narcissistic abuse. Jay holds a BA in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania and an MS in Clinical Psychology from Penn State University.
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Dealing with a friend who behaves in a narcissistic way can be a difficult, frustrating situation. While some people’s narcissistic behavior may come from masking insecurities, others truly believe that they are better than others.[1] So how do you balance your relationship with your friend and your own needs? When is it time to end the friendship? We've got expert advice for you, below. While navigating this complex situation, keep in mind that a friend with narcissistic traits isn’t necessarily a "narcissist" and only a licensed mental health professional can diagnose narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).[2]
Dealing with a Narcissistic Friend
Having a friend with narcissistic tendencies can be challenging. You can assuage your pal by flattering them or making them feel important, but the best way to deal with a narcissistic friend is to speak to them directly and set boundaries around what behavior is (and isn’t) acceptable to you.
Steps
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Expert Q&A
- QuestionHow do I deal with a narcissistic friend?Jay Reid, LPCCJay Reid is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC) in private practice in San Francisco, CA. He specializes in helping clients who have survived a narcissistic parent or partner. Treatment focuses upon helping clients identify and challenge self-diminishing beliefs as a result of narcissistic abuse. Jay holds a BA in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania and an MS in Clinical Psychology from Penn State University.
Licensed Professional Clinical CounselorHave a conversation with another person who is capable of being more generous and reciprocal about the friendship. Determine what you find satisfying in the relationship, and what you think is enough in terms of what you can get out of it. It may be that ultimately, the amount of needs or expectations the narcissist can meet is unsatisfactory. You want to have clarity of mind about the situation.
Tips
- Take your time when you get to know someone, which will help you recognize a narcissistic personality before they're too close to you.Thanks
- Keep in mind that your friend may not realize they’re doing things that are hurting you. If they truly have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), these behaviors are symptoms that they can’t always control. With therapy and other treatments, however, they can learn to manage their symptoms and develop healthy relationships.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201408/8-ways-handle-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20366690
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556001/
- ↑ Jay Reid, LPCC. Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. Expert Interview. 7 Aug 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201802/narcissistic-friends-what-s-the-attraction
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201802/narcissistic-friends-what-s-the-attraction
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201408/8-ways-handle-narcissist
- ↑ Jay Reid, LPCC. Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. Expert Interview. 7 Aug 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201408/8-ways-handle-narcissist
- ↑ Jay Reid, LPCC. Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor. Expert Interview. 7 Aug 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201711/the-catch-22-dealing-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201610/6-the-more-subtle-signs-narcissism
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201711/the-catch-22-dealing-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201408/8-ways-handle-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lifetime-connections/201802/narcissistic-friends-what-s-the-attraction
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201408/8-ways-handle-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/features/handle-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/features/handle-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201711/the-catch-22-dealing-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201711/the-catch-22-dealing-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201711/the-catch-22-dealing-narcissist
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
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