This article was co-authored by Jay Reid, LPCC and by How.com.vn staff writer, Hunter Rising. Jay Reid is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC) in private practice in San Francisco, CA. He specializes in helping clients who have survived a narcissistic parent or partner. Treatment focuses upon helping clients identify and challenge self-diminishing beliefs as a result of narcissistic abuse. Jay holds a BA in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania and an MS in Clinical Psychology from Penn State University.
There are 13 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Abusers may seem charming and polite at first, but what should you do when they start showing their true colors? Rather than giving them what they want and feeling drained, taking the power into your own hands and ignoring them is the best way to cut them off. When you ignore an abuser, you’re taking away their control, and they may respond differently depending on your relationship. If you’re nervous about how a person may react once you start ignoring them, don’t worry because we have you covered. Keep reading to find out how to start ignoring a manipulator and how you can expect them to respond afterward.
Things You Should Know
- Abusers may feel anxious, scared, or upset when you start ignoring them since they’re not in control anymore.
- Abusers may try to gaslight you or shift the blame so they’re not accountable. Just keep ignoring them and trusting your feelings so you don’t give back control.
- Cut off abusers by stopping all communication if you’re able to. If you can’t fully avoid a manipulative person, then give the bare minimum response.
Steps
Expert Q&A
Tips
- It’s completely normal to feel upset or sad when you’re cutting off a person you love. Give yourself some time to grieve about the relationship, but look forward to all the time you have to focus on yourself and other relationships.[14]Thanks
- Remember that your perspective and what you have to say are completely valid and true to you, no matter what an abuser may tell you. You’re allowed to think differently and disagree with them if your feelings don’t align.Thanks
References
- ↑ https://www.simplypsychology.org/stonewalling-narcissists-silent-treatment-method-draft.html
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder/when-a-narcissist-sees-you-happy#tips-for-dealing-with-a-narcissist
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/discoveries/2018/05/narcissists-7-weaknesses-reveal#2
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shame-guilt-and-their-defenses/201903/when-cut-ties-the-narcissist-in-your-life
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7427292/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202103/why-narcissists-and-abusers-wont-let-go-and-what-you-can-do
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/recovering-narcissist/2019/07/5-attitudes-including-malicious-envy-expose-malignant-narcissists-according-to-research#5
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202103/why-narcissists-and-abusers-wont-let-go-and-what-you-can-do
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201606/how-leave-narcissist-good
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7427292/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-zen/201502/forget-co-parenting-narcissist-do-instead
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/recovering-narcissist/2019/08/5-powerful-ways-to-turn-off-narcissists-sociopaths-and-psychopaths-how-to-protect-yourself-in-dating#3
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201606/how-leave-narcissist-good
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