How to Get a Girl to Like You

Getting a girl to like you can be difficult, but there are things you can do to help get them interested. Caring about your appearance and personality can help her notice you so you’re able to introduce yourself. If you’ve already reached out to the girl, being a good friend to her can help develop your feelings for one another and help you learn more about each other. After you become friends, reaching out and telling her how you feel could lead to a relationship!

Things You Should Know

Show your crush that you're confident and charismatic—smile around her, make strong eye contact, and be polite.
Build up your rapport with her. If you text her regularly and make her laugh, she'll start to feel closer to you over time.
Start flirting with her to let her know you're interested and when you're ready, be open about your feelings for her.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Getting Her to Notice You

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1
Practice good personal hygiene. If you look clean and hygienic, then you’ll seem more approachable to the girl you’re interested in. Take a shower or bath every day and use body soap and shampoo so you don’t have body odor. Brush your teeth and use mouthwash to prevent bad breath, and keep yourself well-groomed so you can look your best.^{[1]XResearch source}
- Wash your face once or twice a day to help prevent pimples or acne breakouts.
- Personal hygiene also includes wearing clean, good-smelling clothes so you don’t appear dirty or messy.
- Don’t overuse body sprays or colognes since the scents could become overwhelming.
2
Find an interesting hobby and be passionate about it. Spend time developing your own personal interests so you can seem more intriguing to the girl you like. Look for hobbies that you enjoy doing, such as sports, board games, listening to music or drawing, so you can find out what you like doing in your spare time. Try new things to stay interesting and make the girl more curious about you.^{[2]XResearch source}
- If you’re still in school, look for clubs with other students so you can get together and share your hobby with others.
- Don’t stick with a hobby if you don’t like it just because someone you like is also interested in it. Be genuine with what you enjoy.
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3
Act confident around her to make her more interested. Avoid comparing yourself to others since it can make you appear less confident in yourself. Recognize what you’re talented in and what you like about yourself so you can feel comfortable in your own skin. Practice being confident by doing activities that you’re a little uncomfortable with, such as talking to a stranger or taking up another hobby that you’ve wanted to try for a while. As you gain confidence, the girl you want to like you may notice and could be more interested in talking to you.^{[3]XResearch source}
- Stand with good posture and maintain eye contact to seem more confident while you’re interacting with others.
Tip: It’s okay if you fail at some things. Failure is bound to happen, so continue working past it so you can stay confident about other things.
4
Be polite and courteous to others so she can see your manners. Don’t be rude to other people and stay respectful to others so you don’t come across as mean-spirited. Listen to others intently as they talk and have meaningful conversations with them so they can see you genuinely care. Say “please” and “thank you” when you’re asking for something so the girl can see how polite you are and know that you’re a caring individual.^{[4]XResearch source}
- Continue being polite and kind even when you aren’t around the girl so you stay genuine.
5
Smile when you see the girl so you look more approachable. Whenever you see the girl and you make eye contact with one another, smile slightly so she can see you’re a friendly person. The girl will feel more comfortable around you when you smile since you’ll seem approachable and kind.^{[5]XExpert SourceJohn Keegan
Dating CoachExpert Interview. 5 November 2019.} If she smiles back, she may also be interested in you or want to get to know you better.^{[6]XResearch source}
- Don’t stare too long at the girl since she could get uncomfortable.
- If the girl doesn’t smile, then she may not be interested in you.
6
Introduce yourself to the girl when you feel comfortable. If you’ve smiled at one another and you feel confident, approach the girl and say hello. Tell her your name, and ask her for her name and how she’s doing. Mention something you have in common or an observation about something nearby so you have a common topic to talk about. Maintain eye contact and smile while you’re talking so you seem friendly and approachable. If the girl wants to get to know you better, she’ll maintain the conversation or give you her phone number.^{[7]XResearch source}
- For example, you may say something like, “Hey, my name’s John. How has your day been so far?”
- If you’re still in school and you’re nervous, look for a time between classes where you can talk to her in the hall, or ask if she wants to work on a project together if you share a class.
- If the girl doesn’t seem interested in you, say something like, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you,” and leave. Don’t try to keep talking or follow her since you can make her feel uncomfortable.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Being Her Friend

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1
Talk about something that you two have in common. When you first start talking, ask a few questions about what she’s interested in so you can get to know one another. Look for common topics that you’re both interested in so you can both get involved in the conversation. Avoid interrupting the girl when she’s talking to show that you’re polite and care about what she’s telling you.^{[8]XResearch source}
- For example, you may talk about work, favorite movies or music, and hobbies you do.
- If you’re still in school, you may talk about classes you’ve had together, school events, or clubs that you’re a part of.
- Avoid talking about yourself too much or bragging since it could come across as being self-centered and that you don’t care about the girl as much.^{[9]XResearch source}
2
Ask the girl questions about herself so you get to know her better. Learn more about the girl by asking her questions about what she enjoys or likes to do. Maintain eye contact and listen attentively to her to show that you’re genuinely interested in what she’s saying. If the conversation is going well, try asking personal questions to learn more about her goals and what she wants to do in the future.^{[10]XResearch source}
- Remember to respond openly and honestly to any questions she has for you so she can get to know you well too.
- Don’t ask personal questions if she seems uncomfortable with the conversation.^{[11]XExpert SourceJohn Keegan
  Dating CoachExpert Interview. 5 November 2019.}
3
Tell jokes and be funny to show your sense of humor. Add a little humor into your conversation to make it more light-hearted and fun for her. Tell funny stories about yourself or make funny comments in response to something either of you has said in the conversation earlier. If you can make her laugh, it may be a sign that she likes you or appreciates your company.^{[12]XResearch source}
- For example, if you were talking about if you have any pets, you may mention a funny story about a pet you once had to connect with her more.
- Don’t only tell jokes or try to be funny since the girl may think that you don’t know when to take things seriously.
Tip: Watch her eyes when she laughs to see where she looks. If she looks at you while she’s laughing, then it may be a sign that she’s interested in you.
4
Be there for her when she needs to talk to someone. If you’ve talked with the girl for a while, you may be able to notice when she feels off or down. Ask her how she’s feeling and ask if there’s anything you can do to help. Offer to listen to her if she needs to vent and only give advice if she asks for it. Let her know that you care and that you just want her to be happy to show that you’re genuine. As you spend time listening and talking to her, she may notice how much you enjoy spending time with her and develop similar interests in you.^{[13]XResearch source}
- For example, you may say, “Hey, it didn’t seem like you were having a good time earlier. Do you want to talk about it?”
- If the girl doesn’t want to talk about it or isn’t comfortable, let her know that you’re available when she wants to talk and let her be so you don’t overstep any boundaries.
5
Text the girl so you can stay connected when you aren’t together. Start your text conversations by asking how her day was or what she did over the weekend to break the ice. Talk like you normally would in person by asking questions and being funny. Pay attention to how long her messages are and how often she texts you since longer, frequent messages may be a sign that she’s starting to like you.^{[14]XExpert SourceJohn Keegan
Dating CoachExpert Interview. 5 November 2019.}
- Send her good morning and good night texts to show the girl that you’re thinking about her.
- Don’t send too many texts in a row without getting a response since you may seem desperate.
- If she doesn’t text you back at all, she may not feel comfortable talking to you.
6
Share secrets with one another to show the girl that you trust her. If the girl feels comfortable with you, she may be willing to open up and tell you something private. Listen intently and don’t tell anyone else about the secret so you don’t break her trust. If she tells you something personal, offer to do the same to show her that you trust her as much as she trusts you. Having a secret with one another can help strengthen your bond and make her like you more.^{[15]XResearch source}
- For example, you may share something embarrassing that happened to you if she told you something she’s embarrassed about.
7
Spend time with the girl and her friends to bond with them. If you and the girl are comfortable around one another, then you may be able to spend time with her and some of her friends. Be respectful and polite around her friends, and be yourself so they can get to know you. If you’re nice to her friends and they like you as well, then she could get more interested in you.^{[16]XResearch source}
- Look for things or events that you can do as a group, such as bowling, going out to eat, or attending a concert.
- Don’t try to force yourself into her group of friends if she’s not interested in you since you could make her uncomfortable. Only hang out with them if you’re invited.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Expressing Your Interest

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1
Try flirting with her to see how she responds to it. After you are comfortable with the girl and developed your friendship, try to initiate flirting with her to see if she’s interested. Lean in while you’re talking to her while maintaining eye contact and smiling. Playfully tease her or make and make her laugh so you can bond with one another. As you flirt, she may mimic your movements and lean closer to you as well to show that she likes you.^{[17]XResearch source}
- Don’t tease too much since you may come across as insensitive.
- If the girl doesn’t seem responsive to flirting or she doesn’t flirt back, she may not be interested in a relationship.
- You can also flirt over text if you aren’t together in person. If you flirt over text, be sure to flirt with her while you’re together or else you may send her mixed signals.
2
Give compliments to show that you’re interested in her. Tell the girl things you like about her appearance and her personality to show that you’re paying attention to her. Mention what you admire about her, like her attitude or how she maintains herself, to make the girl more likely to enjoy spending time with you. Be genuine with your compliments so she doesn’t feel like you’re being dishonest with her.^{[18]XResearch source}
- For example, you may say something like, “Your hair looks really nice,” or “I love that dress. Is it new?”
- If you want to compliment her personality, you may say something like, “I really admire your sense of humor,” or “You’re the most determined person I know, and I appreciate that about you.”
3
Touch her if she’s comfortable with it. Start by leaning in closer while you’re talking or by sitting closer to her. Gauge her interest in you touching her by casually bumping your hand into her arm or asking if she wants a hug. Don’t touch her inappropriately and be respectful to her if she doesn’t respond how you want. If she’s comfortable around you and wants to pursue a relationship, then she may try to touch you as well.^{[19]XResearch source}
- If you still don’t know if she’s interested in you touching her, then ask her directly to show that you respect her.
Warning: Don’t touch a girl if she doesn’t want to be touched. Respect her personal space and boundaries if she isn’t comfortable.
4
Tell the girl how you feel about her so she knows that you’re interested. If you’ve spent time together and you want to know what she thinks of you, open up and let her know how you’re feeling. Be honest with her and tell her what’s on your mind. Once you express your feelings for the girl, ask her how she feels to gauge her interest. Listen to her intently and respect any decision she makes.^{[20]XResearch source}
- For example, you may say something like, “I’ve really enjoyed spending time together and getting to know you. You’re funny, smart, and driven, and I’m starting to have feelings for you.”
- Don’t feel rushed to ask the girl if she’s interested in you. Take time to develop your friendship first so you’re comfortable around one another.
- If she says she doesn’t feel the same, say that it’s okay and ask if you can remain friends. Rejection is bound to happen at some point in your life, so learning how to handle it can help you feel more confident.
5
Ask the girl out on a date if you have mutual feelings for each other. If she expresses interest in you as well, ask her if she wants to go out on a date to spend more time together. Look for fun events you can attend together, restaurants you can try, or movies you want to see. Spend the time on your date getting to know her on a more personal level. Flirt and compliment her throughout the date to show that you’re serious about the relationship.^{[21]XResearch source}
- If she says no to the date, don’t get upset and tell her that it’s okay. Respect her decision and don’t try to pursue her if she doesn’t want you to.

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Question
Why do you need to be yourself?
Community Answer
The point of being yourself around her is that she won't be surprised by who you really are and will be happy with you long term. For example, if you've pretended that you like horse riding and spending time writing poetry only because you know she likes these things but you couldn't care less, then she'll be disappointed when she discovers you made up those interests just to attract her but you're not interested in them at all.
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I want more information about flirting.
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A great place to get started is to read How to Flirt, where you'll find some great tips!
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What if you have an awful last name? Should you tell her before she gets to know you more?
Community Answer
Be proud of your name. Make sure that not only this girl but other people know you are who you are, not who your last name paints you as. Often people make fun of other people to deal with their own insecurities and they continue if you don't stand up to them.
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Tips

Always respect the girl that you’re pursuing so she doesn’t get uncomfortable around you.
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If she has accounts on social media platforms, follow her! Like and comment on her posts, and show your support.
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Warnings

Never touch a girl if she’s not comfortable with it. Don’t try to touch her inappropriately and respect her decisions.
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If the girl isn’t interested in you, respect her decision and be polite to her. Don’t get angry or clingy if she doesn’t want to spend time with you.
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Don’t try to go after a girl who’s already in a relationship.
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