Where to Meet Single Women

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The best spots to find and connect with other singles

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• Places to Meet Single Women
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• Approaching Women
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• Expert Interview

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Finding romance in the digital age looks a bit different than it did even 5 or 10 years ago, but rest assured that the dating pool is as alive and bustling as ever, so long as you know where to look. That’s why we chatted with dating coach and matchmaker Cher Gopman to get the inside scoop on the best places to meet single women, from the traditional bar or coffee shop to the more surprising meet-cute spots.

Things You Should Know

• Visit a bar, club, party, or casual hangout with your friends to meet people in a relaxed, social setting, where they’re likely to be looking, themselves.
• Make a profile on a dating app to chat with singles in a low-stakes format that lets you see many romantic options at once.
• Join a hobby group or take classes based on your personal interests to meet like-minded people in a more intimate group setting.

Steps

Section 1 of 2:

Places to Meet Single Women

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   Bars and clubs Research indicates 20% of couples meet in bars. It makes sense—bars and clubs are full of people looking to relax, meet new faces, and have a good time. Happy hour and liquid courage don’t hurt, just drink responsibly!

   • Sit at the bar, rather than a table or booth, to show that you’re open to conversation.
   • Don’t hesitate to introduce yourself to women at bars, too; don’t just wait for them to come to you.
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   Dating apps Roughly 30% of all singles on the market are on dating apps. They’re one of the top places to meet women and find a match, and with a compelling profile and a slick opener, you’re well on your way to a first date.

   • Some leading dating apps include Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, and eHarmony.
   • Make a good dating app profile by including plenty of clear photos of yourself, describing what sort of relationship you’re looking for, and a little about your own interests.
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   Parties and hangouts Research shows that just shy of 30% of couples meet through mutual friends. So next time a buddy’s throwing a party—be it a rager or a more formal affair—send that RSVP ASAP.

   • Even if you don’t meet the girl of your dreams, you’ll most likely expand your social circle, which only ups your chances in the long term.
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   Speed dating or singles events Dating Coach Cher Gopman says that “singles events are a great way to meet people. Speed dating events are also a lot of fun.” These let you meet a ton of single women in a short amount of time, who you can link up with later if there’s chemistry.

   • When speed dating, ask lots of questions and answer your dates’ questions honestly. Tell them what you want from a partner, and why.
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   Classes Whether they’re academic-oriented or hobby classes that teach you to paint, build furniture, or what-have-you, adult classes are great places to make connections. Most meet more than once, giving you a chance to build relationships with your fellow students and more organically form potentially romantic bonds.
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   Hobby groups Dating coach Cher Gopman says that “meetup groups are great if there's something that you're really interested in.” Whether that something is video games, reading books, or birdwatching, local hobby groups are great places to meet like-minded singles.

   • Look up your town or city’s events calendar for a list of upcoming meetings, or browse Craigslist for public invitations.
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   Volunteer organizations Meeting a woman while you’re both working toward a good cause signals that your own head and heart are in the right place, which helps to give her a good opinion of you from the jump. Helping others at a food bank or animal shelter makes you feel good and boosts your self-esteem, too.

   • Just be sure you’re also genuinely working for the cause; try not to take advantage of it as just a dating service.
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   Coffee shops Coffee shops are constantly packed with people from all different walks of life, and striking up a conversation in one is comfortable and low-stakes. Dating coach Cher Gopman says introducing yourself in a coffee shop is as easy as “[asking] the person behind you, ‘What are you getting to drink?’”
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   Libraries or bookstores These give you a built-in conversation starter: Just ask what she’s reading (or wants to read), and if she has any recommendations. And what’s cuter than jotting your number down on a bookmark for her to find when she opens her book?

   • Make sure you have your own recommendations ready when she asks.
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    Co-ed sports teams Dating coach Cher Gopman says that “a co-ed league…like a dodgeball league or a kickball league…is a great way to meet somebody.” Chat with women on the team about the game, or introduce yourself to an opponent who you felt some sparky hints of rivalry with!
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    Concerts or festivals Like bars, concerts are filled with people looking to have a good time, but now with the common ground of the band they’re there to see. Show up early so you can chat with other early birds before the music starts blasting, though.

    • Waiting line in front of the venue is also a good time to strike up a conversation.
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    Gym classes We’d warn you away from flirting with strangers at the gym, who are usually there to work out then get out. But a fitness class, on the other hand, has a much more social aspect to it that makes meeting new people much easier, and even expected.

    • If you do have a gym crush, wait until they’re between workouts, or even packing up, to approach them.
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    Dog parks It’s almost a cliche for a reason. If you’ve got a dog, you’ve also got the perfect wingman. They’ll do most of the work for you when they run up to greet a stranger’s dog. That’s when you introduce yourself and start talking about being a puppy parent.

    • If your dogs get along, you might even ask when they frequent the park, so the dogs (and yourselves) can see each other again.
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    Religious groups Spiritual activities like church, congregation meetups, or even meditation groups let you meet women who share your religious beliefs and values. It’s probably best not to make a move during service, but introducing yourself afterward may just find you your special someone.
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    Local social groups Almost every town or city has groups dedicated to simply meeting up and chatting. Sometimes it’s about specific things, like politics, other times it’s about anything at all. Check your local library or city events schedule for groups like this, and duck in on the next meeting.
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    Out and about Dating coach Cher Gopman says, “If you find you're out and about and you see someone you're attracted to, [take] full advantage of the situation because it's never going to be the perfect time to meet somebody.” The grocery store, dog groomer, post office—there are plenty of fish in the proverbial sea, and that sea is all around you!
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Section 2 of 2:

Approaching Women

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   Start a conversation by talking about the place, or the context. You always have something in common, which is where you are and what’s happening around you. Approach a woman by asking a question about your location, or what she’s doing, to get her attention in a casual, comfortable way. For example, try:

   • “Do you know what kind of flowers these are?”
   • “What breed of dog is that?”
   • “Is that the new iPhone? Do you like it?”
   • “Do you know what’s going on over there?”
   • “What are you eating? Looks delicious!”
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   Keep your body language open and friendly. Dating coach Cher Gopman says, “a smile allows the other person to feel at ease with you. Make sure you have that strong eye contact…Showing that you're really present in the moment is a signal for flirting.”

   • Also, avoid crossing your arms, keep your shoulders loose, and strike a casual, easy pose, like leaning your weight on one leg.
   • Always approach from the side or the front. Approaching from the back may startle a stranger, which doesn’t make a great impression, and puts them on guard.
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   Relax, don’t overthink it, and go with the flow of conversation. Treat the encounter like making a new acquaintance, rather than kicking off a sweeping love story. That makes it low-stakes and casual, and helps to keep you relaxed. Let the conversation and interaction play out like you’re just bumping into someone, rather than making a romantic advance.

   • Even if the conversation doesn’t go as you hoped, you just got some great practice approaching and chatting with strangers. Keep at it!
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   Ask for her number just before you leave. If you felt some chemistry during your conversation, don’t hesitate to ask for her number. This is best done toward the end, both to give you time to get to know each other, and to reduce any awkward segues in the conversation. Say something like:

   • “I’ve really enjoyed talking to you, and would love to chat or text again. Can I get your contact information?”
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   End the conversation after a few minutes to keep it comfortable. It’s best not to linger too long. Sticking around could make things awkward, or make you seem desperate. Remember that this is just a first encounter, and romance can come later, once you’ve laid some groundwork.

   • To that, don’t feel pressured to talk about romance, or even to flirt too hard. There’s plenty of time for that later, if things go well now.
   • Of course, if you’re really hitting it off, stick around until the conversation fades naturally!
   • Say something like, “It was great to meet you, but I’ve gotta run. Maybe I’ll see you around?”
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