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This article was co-authored by Rachel Kove. Rachel Kove is a Certified Recovery Coach, Serial Entrepreneur, Published Author, Mental Health Advocate, and Actress with over 13 years of experience. She recently developed and became Co-Owner of Transformational Solutions, a life coaching program specializing in addiction, trauma, and personal development. Rachel also co-created the V.I.S.I.O.N.S program, an online self-improvement curriculum designed to help people get unstuck emotionally and accomplish their goals. Additionally, she co-hosts the weekly podcast “Kicking it With The Koves” alongside her brother and father, Jesse and Martin Kove.
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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This article has been viewed 256,066 times.
Porn addiction is a serious problem no matter what, but it can be even more severe if you’re a Muslim. Accessing porn can interfere with your sense of spiritual well-being, which may cause you to feel ashamed. Luckily, there are ways that you can overcome a porn addiction. Start by reaching out to other people for help. You can also use strategies to prevent yourself from accessing porn and to develop healthier habits.
Steps
Keep a diary to identify what triggers you to look at porn. The first step to change anything is awareness, so you need to be honest with yourself and understand your relationship to the pornography. Try keeping a diary of times when you felt tempted to access porn and any times that you followed through with the urges as well. Record how you were feeling, where you were, what time of day it was, and any other factors that you think may have contributed to your urge to access porn. Make a note of the feelings of shame and guilt that you felt afterwards. Review your diary after 2 weeks to look for patterns.[1]- For example, you might notice that you tend to become aroused and access porn late at night, after watching movies that feature love scenes, or when you’re bored. Knowing these triggers can help you to be more mindful and prevent accessing porn.
Make a list of the pros and cons of accessing porn. Writing down all the reasons why you like and dislike using porn may help you to see it as more negative than positive. This may also help you to become more mindful of the habit. List anything that you view as positive about accessing porn under the pros side and everything you see as negative about it under the cons side.[2]- For example, under pros you might list things like “relaxes me,” “takes my mind off being lonely,” and “makes me feel good for a little while.” Under the cons side, you might list things like, “costs me money,” “makes me feel ashamed and dirty,” “displeases my Creator" and "will lead me to Hellfire."
- Try keeping the list with you and reading over it often to help remind yourself of the reasons why you want to stop using porn.
- Try to understand how the Shaytaan (devil) operates, how he takes advantage of human weaknesses and tries to weaken our faith by drawing us towards temptation.
Block porn sites on your computer and other devices. This may be a good option if you find yourself mindlessly accessing them. Download a browser that makes it easy to block the porn sites or change the settings in your existing browser to make these sites off limits.[3]- Subscribe to an internet accountability service, which periodically sends a list of questionable websites visited and internet searches to a trusted confidant, religious leader or parent, to whom you will have then to account for your choices.
- For a more extreme option, you might even cancel your home internet access for a month or two so that you will have no way of getting to porn sites while you are at home.
Turn to Allah by saying a prayer whenever you get the urge to access porn. If your faith is your primary motivation for quitting porn, praying will be a helpful strategy for you. Try saying a prayer every time you get the urge to access porn. Ask Allah to give you the strength to resist your urges and help you to become a good Muslim. You might even write down the prayer to pull it out and recite it any time you feel tempted.[4]- If you do slip up, it is very important to pray to Allah to acknowledge your sin, promise with sincerity not to repeat it and ask for forgiveness.
- Remember that Allah loves to forgive those that turn to Him when they fall to temptation, but hates it when we repeat the same sin and may decide that punishment is due.
Tip: You could even make the prayer your background on your computer home screen and phone lock screen so you will see it whenever you turn on your device.
Watch for signs of porn addiction in yourself. Porn addiction can cause many of the same types of issues as other addictions, such as to alcohol or drugs. Check yourself for symptoms to determine if you might benefit from seeking help. You might be addicted to porn if you:[5]- Feel out of control and unable to stop or limit your porn use.
- Experience a cycle of shame, guilt, remorse, and depression after viewing porn.
- Go out of your way to conceal your porn habit from other people.
- Spend a large amount of time thinking about pornography.
- Have developed a masturbation habit when viewing porn.
- Have increased the amount of time that you spend watching porn and let it interfere with other responsibilities.
- Experience relationship issues as a result of your porn use.
Talk with a trusted friend, family member, or imam. Muslims are normally encouraged to conceal their sins but reaching out to someone for help is an important part of recovery, so find someone trustworthy to talk to about what you’re going through. Make sure to choose someone of the same gender who makes you feel comfortable and who will not excessively criticize you or shame you for your addiction.[6]- Try saying something like, “I think I might be addicted to pornography and I want to stop using it.”
- Or you could say something like, “I’m worried that I might have an addiction. I am not sure what to do about it.”
Find a Muslim therapist who has experience treating porn addiction. Talking with a trusted professional and getting psychotherapy is one of the best and healthiest ways to work through a porn addiction because a therapist can help you to develop new tools and strategies to avoid using porn. They can also help you to better understand the religious context of this evil addiction and this may also help you to stop. Find a therapist who has experience treating porn addiction in Muslims and meet with them regularly.[7]- You can search online to find a Muslim therapist in your area who may be able to help you or ask at your local mosque.
Tip: When you meet with a therapist for the first time, be honest with them about why you are seeking treatment. Remember that therapists help people with these types of problems on a regular basis, so there is no need to feel shy about bringing it up.
Look into 12-step support groups in your area. Look into Sexaholics Anonymous (SA) meetings in your area and go to a meeting. Attending 12-step support group meetings can help you by giving you opportunities to share your experiences and hear what other people have done to overcome similar circumstances. Being part of a community of people who are all working to overcome their addiction to sex and porn may also help you to feel less alone.[8]- If there are no meetings in your area, consider participating in online meetings or an online forum on overcoming porn addiction.
- Try to ensure that your advice comes from an Islamic perspective as some non-Muslim therapists may try to encourage you to satisfy your urges in haram (forbidden by Islam) ways.
- Study the evidence from the Qur'an and Sunnah that forbids sexual gratification outside marriage and use the divinely prescribed penalties to motivate yourself to stay away from such sin.
- Understand that intentionally sinning in this way leads to Hellfire and that only Allah can save you from this fate.
- Try to be mindful of the rewards that are available in this life and the next to those that are able to control their inner desires and live life in the way that pleases Allah.
Ask your doctor about trying medication to help reduce your urges. While medication has not been well studied for its effects on treating porn addiction, some medications can help to reduce your libido and curb addictive tendencies. Ask your doctor about medications if your addiction is severe or if you have been unable to control your porn use with other strategies.[9]- Examples of medications that may be helpful for treating porn addiction include naltrexone, paroxetine, and SSRI antidepressants, such as fluoxetine and sertraline.
Exercise for 30 minutes on most days of the week. Exercising can help you to feel better by releasing endorphins and reducing stress. This may make more tired and less likely to want to access porn at bedtime. Choose a form of exercise that you enjoy and participate in it for 30 minutes on most days of the week.[10]- For example, you could try running, biking, swimming, boxing, horse riding, archery or something else that you like doing.
Volunteer at your mosque or in your community to fill spare time. Spending spare time helping other Muslims or promoting a good cause may help to get your mind off of porn. Look into activities that you could participate in through your mosque if you want to spend more time around other Muslims or work on deepening your faith. Or, you could volunteer at a local homeless shelter or other charity for the less fortunate.[11]- You could also look into a class or study group at your mosque to help you develop your relationship with Allah.
- Consider volunteering at a madrassa to help young Muslims learn about their religion.
- Try to develop your daily routine of worship, especially your prayers, so that pleasing Allah becomes the central focus of every day. That way, you will find it much easier to combat temptation and stay away from sin.
- A great way of becoming more mindful of Allah is by repeating beautiful phrases, such as Alhamdulillah and Allahu Akbar, over and over again as you go about your daily business.
Set goals for yourself to stay focused on something positive. Having goals may also help you to avoid accessing porn. Identify a skill you’d like to learn, a hobby you’d like to take up, or a personal goal you’d like to work towards.[12]- For example, you could set a goal to run a 5K, learn to recite your favourite surah with beautiful Tajweed, or try to improve your Arabic.
- Closely following the Islamic dress code is a good way of reminding yourself of the standards of behavior that are expected of all young Muslims.
Manage stress and anxiety with relaxation techniques. If you sometimes feel triggered to access porn due to stress, learning some stress reduction techniques may be helpful. Try doing deep breathing, yoga, meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation whenever you feel stressed and see if this helps to reduce your urge to access porn.[13]Tip: Praying can also be a relaxing activity, so make sure to practice your daily prayer routine.
Community Q&A
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- QuestionIf sexual intercourse breaks the fast, does this mean even masturbation breaks the fast?
Community AnswerYes. Both of them break the fast. - QuestionWhich verse in the Quran says masturbation is haram?
ZakhlaqCommunity Answer"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7. Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for with their wives. - QuestionI watch porn and I am addicted to it. I really want to stop and I have managed to stop multiple times but then I go back to watching it. I've repented, but I keep doing it, what can I do to stop it?
Community AnswerYou can try utilizing sites like keepmeout.com. They can block the sites you frequent and want to avoid. You can also just try to be more mentally determined to stop. Pray for help and follow the steps in this article as well.
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References
- ↑ https://www.confidanthealth.com/understanding-addiction/journaling-about-triggers
- ↑ https://www.mindtools.com/a7asu8d/quantitative-pros-and-cons
- ↑ https://www.choosingtherapy.com/how-to-stop-watching-porn/
- ↑ https://islamqa.info/en/answers/22917/how-to-stop-looking-at-porn
- ↑ https://www.utdallas.edu/counseling/pornaddiction/
- ↑ https://muslimmatters.org/2018/02/28/10-ways-to-overcome-porn-addiction/
- ↑ https://www.utdallas.edu/counseling/pornaddiction/
- ↑ https://muslimmatters.org/2018/02/28/10-ways-to-overcome-porn-addiction/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6352245/
About This Article
Certified Recovery Coach
This article was co-authored by Rachel Kove. Rachel Kove is a Certified Recovery Coach, Serial Entrepreneur, Published Author, Mental Health Advocate, and Actress with over 13 years of experience. She recently developed and became Co-Owner of Transformational Solutions, a life coaching program specializing in addiction, trauma, and personal development. Rachel also co-created the V.I.S.I.O.N.S program, an online self-improvement curriculum designed to help people get unstuck emotionally and accomplish their goals. Additionally, she co-hosts the weekly podcast “Kicking it With The Koves” alongside her brother and father, Jesse and Martin Kove. This article has been viewed 256,066 times.
Co-authors: 29
Updated: March 29, 2024
Views: 256,066
Categories: Islam
Article SummaryX
Quitting porn as a Muslim can be stressful, but your faith can help you through the process, among other good habits. Try blocking porn sites using a program or browser extension to make it harder for yourself to give into temptation. Whenever you get the urge to watch porn, stay calm and say a prayer to bring you strength and wisdom. If you’re still struggling, try doing some exercise or something productive to distract yourself. If you have a lot of free time, consider volunteering at your mosque or in your community to give you something better to focus on. You can also find a local 12-step program to help you deal with your impulses. If the pressure is too hard to deal with, consider talking to a close friend, family member, or imam for extra guidance. For more tips, including how to manage your stress when you get the impulse to watch porn, read on.
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