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This article was co-authored by Kirsten Parker, MFA and by How.com.vn staff writer, Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA. Kirsten Parker is a Mindset and Action Coach based in her hometown of Los Angeles, California. She helps high achievers overcome stress and self-doubt. She specializes in increasing one's confidence and clarity by incorporating tools from positive psychology, mindful habit change, and self-regulation into her coaching. She is a Certified HeartMath Practitioner trained in Stress, Anxiety, and Intelligent Energy Management along with Emotional Intelligence and the Science of Self-Acceptance. She also holds an MFA from Yale University School of Drama in Stage Management.
There are 19 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
This article has been viewed 593,403 times.
When you imagine what your life will look like in the future, you probably picture yourself achieving your dreams. Whether your goal is running a marathon, writing a book, learning an instrument, or building a career, you can do anything if it’s important to you and you stick with it. Just get started, and you might be surprised what you can accomplish!
Steps
Take a small, easy step to start working on your goal. It’s often hard to get started, especially if you aren’t sure how you’ll cross the finish line. Don’t worry about the end result in the beginning. Instead, just do a small action that contributes toward your goal. Set aside about 15-30 minutes to do a simple task.[1]- For instance, let’s say you want to learn how to play guitar. You might spend 15 minutes reading about chords and trying to put your hands in the correct position.
- If your goal is to make pottery, you might spend 15 minutes learning the terms you’ll need or playing around with a small ball of clay.
Set a specific, measurable goal so you can track your progress. First, define what you want to do. Then, figure out how you can measure your progress toward your goal.[2] Finally, attach a basic time frame for achieving your goal. This will make it easier for you to measure your progress.[3]- For instance, let’s say your goal is to lose weight. You might first decide you want to lose 25 pounds. You could do weekly weigh-ins to chart your progress and may set a timeline of 1 year.
- Similarly, you might want to start a YouTube channel. You might set a goal to post 1 new video each week. You could chart your progress by keeping track of how often you post and how many views you get.
Tip: Be flexible about your time frame and plans for tracking your progress. You’ll likely encounter obstacles, so you may need to make adjustments to stay on track.
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Break your goal down into smaller steps. A big goal can be difficult to tackle, so go step-by-step.[4] Identify the steps you’ll need to take to accomplish your goal, then list them out in the order you need to do them. Check off each step as you complete it.[5]- As an example, let’s say you want to write a novel. Your smaller steps might be to plan your story, create an outline, write a first draft, ask for feedback, make revisions, and write a second draft.
- If you want to re-decorate your bedroom, your smaller steps might be to pick a theme, choose colors, draw out a plan, paint your walls, buy new items, arrange your furniture, and put out the decor.
Push yourself past your comfort zone. Don’t be afraid to try things that scare you! Leaving your comfort zone will help you grow and develop as a person. Make a list of new things you want to try to help you reach your goal. Then, slowly check off each thing.[6]- For instance, let’s say you want to be a singer. Your list might include things like, “sing karaoke in public,” “audition for a musical at the community theater,” “post a singing video online,” and “attend a singing workshop.”
- Similarly, let's say your goal is to climb a mountain. Your list of challenges might include, "go indoor rock climbing," "run bleachers," and "lift weights with a trainer."
Don’t compare yourself to anyone else.[7] It’s understandable that you’d want to compare your progress to someone else’s, but this usually does more harm than good. Instead, measure your progress according to the goals you’ve set for yourself and how you’ve improved over time. Try to ignore what others are doing.[8]- For instance, let’s say your goal is to run a marathon. It’s unfair to you to compare yourself to someone who’s been running marathons for years because they’ve had longer to work on it. Similarly, it’d be unfair to you to compare yourself to your friend who has a thriving business, as that wasn’t your goal.
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How.com.vn Quiz: What Kind of Reality Check Do I Need?
Focus on positive behaviors rather than avoiding unhelpful behaviors. You probably have a few “bad” habits that you’re hoping to replace with “good” ones. Don’t try to stop doing the “bad” habits. Instead, focus on incorporating the positive behaviors you want to do into your life. This will gently move you away from the behaviors you want to stop, which you can replace with the good behaviors.[9]- For example, let’s say you want to start eating a plant-based diet. Don’t focus your attention on cutting out meat. Instead, pick plant-based meals and snacks.
- Similarly, let’s say you want to decrease how often you play video games so you can work out more. Don’t worry about how long you’re playing the games. Instead, schedule in your workouts and focus on reaching that goal.
Remove your temptations to fall back on bad habits. It’s really hard to maintain a new habit, especially when you’re constantly feeling tempted to go back to bad habits. Go through your home and work space and remove things that might tempt you to slip up. If necessary, make some changes to your routine to help you avoid temptation.[10]- In your home, you might remove temptations like unhealthy food or clutter. Similarly, you might put up your gaming system so you have to hook it up to play.
- While you’re working, you might put your phone on silent so the notifications won’t distract you or you might unplug your TV.
Set up cues to remind you of the behaviors you want to do. Just like temptations can draw you back to bad habits, environmental cues can help you engage in your new habits. Put up visual reminders for the behaviors you want to do. Here are some ideas:[11]- Lay out your gym clothes to remind you to workout.
- Set up your laptop and book outline to cue you to write.
- Put healthy foods in the front of your refrigerator so you grab them first.
- Keep your musical instrument out on a stand or table so it’s easy to practice.
Hold yourself accountable for sticking with your new habit. Accountability can help you stick with a new habit so you’re more likely to be successful. Choose an accountability measure that works for you. You might try one of the following:[12]- Recruit an accountability partner.
- Tell the people in your life about your goal.
- Sign up for class or activity related to your goal.
- Post about your progress online.
Reward yourself for engaging in your new habit. You’re more likely to continue a habit if you feel rewarded for it. Most positive habits bring big benefits in the long-term, but it can be hard to stick with them long enough to see results. To encourage you to keeping going, set up a rewards system for yourself.[13]- For instance, you might give yourself 15 minutes of video game time after working on a goal. Similarly, you might buy yourself a new item related to your goal if you complete all of your practice sessions for the week.
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Schedule practice sessions into your weekly schedule. Practice is most effective when you do it often. Spread out your practice sessions over the course of your week. Set aside 15 minutes to an hour to practice on days you can.[14]- For instance, you might decide to practice 4 times per week on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday.
- Don't try to do all of your practice on 1 day. It's better to do 15-30 minutes of practice 4 days a week than to do 4 hours of practice all in one day.
Focus all of your attention on the task at hand during your practice. If you’re distracted during your practice sessions, you’ll learn less and won’t improve as quickly. When you’re practicing, do your best to block out distractions. Direct all of your thoughts to what you’re doing.[15]- It may help to turn off distractions, like your phone or the TV, if you can.
- If you live with family or roommates, ask them to not bother you while you’re doing your practice.
Make small changes to your practice each time to help you grow. You might think that repetition will help you master a skill, and that’s partly true. However, doing something exactly the same way each time won’t help you get better as quickly as changing things up will.[16] Try to make each of your practice sessions a little different to help you keep growing.[17]- For example, let’s say you’re trying to run a marathon. Changes you might make include running on a different terrain, switching routes, running with a partner, running on an incline, or cross training.
- If your goal is to write a novel, you might move to a new work space, try listening to music, or try incorporating a prompt into your idea.
Get feedback from a knowledgeable person to help you improve. Good feedback can help you recognize what you’re doing well and where you can improve. To make sure you’re getting good feedback, talk to someone with knowledge or expertise about what you’re doing. Make sure the person is someone you can trust to be honest with you while still remaining kind.[18]- Let’s say you’re trying to get your art in a local gallery. Your parents likely can’t give you good feedback about your art, but an art teacher or gallery owner can.
- Similarly, let’s say you want to be the chef at your own restaurant. Ask a fellow chef to rate your recipes or invite the foodies in your life to a test dinner.
Let go of the idea of perfection. No one is perfect, and striving for perfection can prevent you from reaching your goals.[19] Rather than trying to be perfect, just try to do your best, as that’s all you can do. Additionally, keep your focus on constantly improving.[20]- It’ll likely take hard work and lots of practice before you’re good at what you’re trying to do. Don’t give up! You can get good at something if you keep at it.
Don’t be afraid to start over. You’ll likely have days when things don’t work out or when you feel like you’ve failed. That’s totally normal, and everyone who is successful has these days. Give yourself permission to start over if things aren’t working out.[21]- For example, let’s say your goal is to run a marathon, but you’re feeling burnt out with your workout plan. You might start over with a totally new training plan.
- Similarly, let’s say you want to write a novel but you hate what you’ve written. It’s okay to start a new draft. Just keep going!
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Track your progress so you can see how far you’ve come. You may not realize how much progress you’re making if you don’t track it. Try different ways of tracking yourself to see what works for you. Here are some ideas:[22]- Put a star on your calendar for days you work on your goal.
- Post progress pics online.
- Tell your friend about your progress.
- Keep a goal diary to track what you’re doing.
- Keep a list of your milestone accomplishments.
Celebrate your small achievements to encourage you to keep going. It usually takes a while to achieve a big goal. However, you’ll likely achieve a lot of small goals along the way. Make a point to celebrate each time you accomplish a small step on your journey toward your goal. This will remind you that you’re making progress and will help you stay on track.[23]- For instance, if you want to run a marathon, you might celebrate each time you finish a shorter race, such as 5k, 10k, and half-marathon runs.
Use positive self-talk to make you feel confident. How you talk to yourself can have a lot of impact on what you’re able to accomplish. Tell yourself supportive statements, and challenge any negative thoughts you have. You might even try using positive affirmations.[24]- Tell yourself things like, “I can do this,” “I’m making so much progress,” and “I can do anything I set my mind to.”
- If you catch yourself thinking something like, “This is too hard,” challenge it. Tell yourself, “I’ve done hard things in the past, and I can do this, too.”
Surround yourself with people who motivate you. Identify the people in your life who make you feel upbeat and capable of reaching your goals. Additionally, look for new friends who share similar goals. Spend more time with these individuals because they’ll help you maintain your motivation.[25]- Consider spending less time with people who try to bring you down. If someone doesn’t support your goals, they likely aren’t a good friend for you.
Treat your failures as a lesson so you keep improving. Making a mistake feels awful, but it’s a normal part of the process toward success.[26] Everyone experiences failure, and sometimes it’s the only way for you to learn how to do something right. When you mess up, try to find the lesson in what happened. Then, try again.[27]- For example, let’s say you audition for a role in a play but don’t get picked. You might talk to the director to find out how your audition could be better.
- Similarly, you might try to run a marathon but not be able to finish. This experience might make you realize you need to change your training regimen.
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Tips
- Don't care what anyone else says about what you want to do. Just believe in yourself and follow your dreams.Thanks
- You don’t need to buy a bunch of supplies to get started. Start where you are and focus on taking small steps.Thanks
- Just be yourself, don't stress about what other people are thinking about you. Be confident and don't rush anything. Take small steps.*Thanks
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References
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/01/to-achieve-big-goals-start-with-small-habits
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.samhsa.gov/sites/default/files/nc-smart-goals-fact-sheet.pdf
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/insights/focus-small-steps-first-then-shift-larger-goal
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-flux/201512/5-benefits-stepping-outside-your-comfort-zone
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prescriptions-life/201803/how-stop-comparing-yourself-others
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/18/well/mind/how-to-build-healthy-habits.html
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cravings/201911/4-ways-avoid-temptation-and-reach-your-goals
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/quora/2018/02/13/the-science-behind-adopting-new-habits-and-making-them-stick/#58bcec1243c7
- ↑ https://learningcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/changing-habits/
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/quora/2018/02/13/the-science-behind-adopting-new-habits-and-making-them-stick/#58bcec1243c7
- ↑ https://www.opencolleges.edu.au/informed/features/not-all-practice-makes-perfect-the-nuances-we-can-learn-from-experts-in-their-fields/
- ↑ https://www.apa.org/education-career/k12/practice-acquisition
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/want_to_learn_a_new_skill_faster_change_up_your_practice_sessions
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2015/05/how-to-get-the-feedback-you-need
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tracking-wonder/202112/pursue-excellence-not-perfection
- ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-do-anything-in-12-steps_b_9551296
- ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-do-anything-in-12-steps_b_9551296
- ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-do-anything-in-12-steps_b_9551296
- ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/3-ways-to-talk-yourself-up
- ↑ https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/motivation-how-to-get-started-and-staying-motivated
- ↑ Kirsten Parker, MFA. Mindset & Action Coach. Expert Interview. 22 July 2020.
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_learn_from_your_failures
About This Article
Mindset & Action Coach
This article was co-authored by Kirsten Parker, MFA and by How.com.vn staff writer, Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA. Kirsten Parker is a Mindset and Action Coach based in her hometown of Los Angeles, California. She helps high achievers overcome stress and self-doubt. She specializes in increasing one's confidence and clarity by incorporating tools from positive psychology, mindful habit change, and self-regulation into her coaching. She is a Certified HeartMath Practitioner trained in Stress, Anxiety, and Intelligent Energy Management along with Emotional Intelligence and the Science of Self-Acceptance. She also holds an MFA from Yale University School of Drama in Stage Management. This article has been viewed 593,403 times.
Co-authors: 160
Updated: February 16, 2024
Views: 593,403
Article SummaryX
To do anything, first come up with a specific goal that you want to accomplish, like running a marathon by the end of the year or learning a new language in 6 months. Then, research everything you need to do to achieve it, and break your goal down into smaller, easier steps that you can work on accomplishing one at a time. For example, the first step toward learning a new language might be signing up for a language class. Finally, focus on completing these small steps, and before you know it, you'll be on your way to achieving your goal! For more tips, like how to make accomplishing your goals easier, read on!
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