How to Know when Your Boyfriend Wants You to Kiss Him

Go in for a kiss at the perfect time using this easy guide

Knowing when to move in for the first kiss can be challenging, but it doesn't have to be. There are plenty of signs to point you in the right direction and keep you from embarrassing yourself. Most guys will let you know, either with their eyes or their words, that they want to kiss you. And once you've made your move, there are several things you can do to let him know you want him to kiss you.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Reading the Signs

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Watch his eyes. A good way to tell if a guy wants to kiss you is to pay attention to where he's looking. If he's looking at your lips or staring into your eyes, he's probably thinking about kissing you.^{[1]XResearch source}
- He may even comment on your lips while he's looking at them. If he compliments your lips, or your eyes, he's ready for the kiss.
- His eyes are a great indicator, but so are his facial expressions. Pay attention to the faces he makes when you are together.^{[2]XResearch source}
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Pay attention to his body language. If your boyfriend starts to get clumsy, or fidgety, he could be getting nervous about kissing you. Don't take it as a sign of boredom, he's probably just waiting for the chance to make his move.
- He may start to play with his hair, touch his face, or even bite his bottom lip.^{[3]XResearch source}
- Distance is a great indicator of desire as well. If he keeps finding ways to get closer to you, you should feel comfortable kissing him.^{[4]XResearch source}
EXPERT TIP
Laura Bilotta
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Laura Bilotta is a Dating Coach, Matchmaker, and the Founder of Single in the City, her dating and relationship coaching service based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. With over 18 years of experience, she focuses on helping singles date more intentionally, encouraging them to let go of negative patterns so that they can attract the love that they deserve. Her experience, skills, and insights have led to thousands of successfully united over 65,000 singles through events and one-on-one matchmaking coaching sessions. She has been the host of The Dating and Relationship Show on Global News Radio 640 Toronto (AM640) for 6 years and is known as The Hookup Queen of Clubhouse; her popular singles club, Single in the City, has over 95.5K members who regularly join in weekly dating and relationship-focused rooms.
Laura Bilotta
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Our Expert Agrees: The main way to tell if a guy wants to kiss you is by checking out his body language. If he's leaning in closer to you when you're talking, gazing into your eyes, smiling at you, or giving you subtle touches, it's a good indication he's thinking about a kiss.
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Listen to him. Don't just listen for compliments, though. Listen to the way he's talking to you. If his voice gets softer, and he starts whispering things to you, he's ready for a kiss.^{[5]XResearch source}
- Whispering also requires him to move in closer to you, making it easier to kiss.^{[6]XResearch source}
- Speaking in a softer tone is an especially good sign if the two of you are in public. He's trying to get your attention and hold it, to make you feel like you two are the only people in the room.^{[7]XResearch source}
If he starts to get quiet, or there are more pauses in the conversation, he may not be losing interest. If he's maintaining eye contact, even if he's quiet, he's still trying to tell you something.
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Notice when he's flirting with you. All guys flirt in different ways, but a few things you can count on are touching and joking. If he's stroking your arm, or your lower back, he's trying to tell you he's into you. The same goes if he's laughing at your jokes, or making his own.^{[8]XResearch source}
- He may also wink at you, which is almost definitely a sign that he's thinking of kissing you.^{[9]XResearch source}

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Going in for the Kiss

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Get close. If you think your boyfriend is ready to kiss you, get close to him. Touch his arm or his face gently to let him know you're ready for a kiss.^{[10]XResearch source}
- Don't cross your arms. Crossing your arms may give him the impression that you're not ready for a kiss. Instead, keep your body open and facing his.^{[11]XResearch source}
- Smile at him to let him know you're comfortable. If you're relaxed, then he'll feel less anxious about making a move to kiss you.^{[12]XResearch source}
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Find a place where you feel comfortable. Kissing releases oxytocin, a chemical that makes us feel happy and relaxed. If you're worried about someone watching you, or an being interrupted, try moving to a new spot.^{[13]XResearch source}
- Once you start kissing, you may want to keep kissing for a while, so it's important to be in a spot where you feel safe.^{[14]XResearch source}
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Make eye contact. Look into your boyfriend's eyes before you kiss him, but also try opening your eyes during the kiss. Eye contact is a great way to build intimacy, especially while kissing.^{[15]XResearch source}
- It might feel a little awkward at first, so don't stare too long while kissing. Just take a moment to look at your boyfriend while kissing, and then shut your eyes.^{[16]XResearch source}
- Take a break between kissing to re-establish eye contact with your boyfriend.^{[17]XResearch source}
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Keep your mouth open. Don't shove your tongue down your boyfriend's throat, and don't cover his mouth in spit. Open your mouth wide enough to let your tongues touch and go from there.^{[18]XResearch source}
- Relax and work together. Try not to think about anything other than the kiss. If you get tense, the kiss will suffer.^{[19]XResearch source}
- Don't breathe through your mouth and into his. Breathe through your nose when you kiss.^{[20]XResearch source}
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Touch him. Keep your hands around his back or neck. Hold him close while you kiss.^{[21]XResearch source}
- Don't get carried away if it's just your first kiss. Take some time to appreciate the power of a kiss on its own. Keep the touching simple and affectionate.^{[22]XResearch source}

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Getting Him to Kiss You

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Relax. The best thing you can do to make sure your guy knows he can kiss you is to relax when he's around you. If you make him feel comfortable, he'll be more willing to let his guard down and move in for a kiss.^{[23]XResearch source}
- Laugh at his jokes, smile at him, do anything you can to put his mind at ease. Making a move, even if it isn't the first, is risky. Guys don't always like to take chances with their egos and self-esteem. Do what you can to encourage him to make a move.^{[24]XResearch source}
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Stay fresh. Brush your teeth and practice good hygiene. Likewise, encourage him to do the same. Offer him a piece of gum if you're planning on kissing him. He may even take that as a sign that you're in the mood to kiss.^{[25]XResearch source}
- If you have chapped lips, use some lip balm. Make your lips appealing so he'll want to kiss you.^{[26]XResearch source}
Tell him you're cold. Ask for his jacket. Make him hug you. Guys respond pretty well to direct orders like this. If you can get him close to you, and hold him tight, he may not be able to keep himself from kissing you.^{[27]XResearch source}
If nothing else, just tell him you want to kiss him. Pull him close, look him right in the eyes and tell him right out that you want him to kiss you. Chances are he'll respond with a kiss.^{[28]XResearch source}