How to Flirt With a Cancer

Flirting with anyone can be a challenge, so sometimes it helps to cater to your audience. One way of doing this is knowing the person's astrological sign in order to understand their character traits. People born under the sign of Cancer, between June 21 and July 22, can be extra tricky. Their need for independence can seem like a contradiction to their longing for deep relationships. Flirting in a way which appeals to them could help you crack that protective crab shell, which is the symbol for Cancer.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Attracting a Cancer

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1
Let them lead. Cancers are both born leaders and astute financial planners. If they are a part of a group, they are likely to be at the head, leading it. They are also very good with their money and can be quite successful at anything they set out to achieve.
- Don’t be intimidated by this aspect of Cancer. While they are successful leaders, they are also incredibly sensitive. The power and success does not go to their head.
2
Appeal to their artistic and cultural side. They tend to appreciate lavish dinners, the arts and cultural experiences. They will be open to someone who is well-versed in the arts and appreciates extravagance.^{[1]XResearch source}
- Tell them about the last book you read and which part was most touching to you.
- Suggest a fine dining restaurant and describe your favorite dish.
- Talk about plays and movies which have meant a lot to you and stirred your emotions.
- Mention museums and your favorite works of art.
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3
Go with the flow. A Cancer can be prone to mood swings. Don’t let this throw you off. They are incredibly emotional and can seem contradictory with these emotions or move through several emotions in a short amount of time.
- Be kind when their emotions begin to appear.
- Attempt to find logic and reason for their feelings. Stay sensible as they become emotional.
- Love astrology? Take this quiz to discover your soulmate’s sign.

Part 2

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Interacting with a Cancer

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A Cancer will rarely make the first move, so it is going to be up to you to step up and initiate a conversation. Their emotional delicacy and fear of rejection tends to keep them at bay, but they will be open to your initiation.^{[2]XResearch source}
2
Give a Cancer space and time. Do not rush them into a decision on the spot.^{[3]XExpert SourceMaria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating ExpertExpert Interview. 20 December 2019.} If you try to force them to give you an answer right away, that answer will likely be “no” and they will pull away from you. Make suggestions and allow them time to make their decision.^{[4]XResearch source}
- If you ask them on a date, give them options of when and where, then allow them time to decide.
- Leave them with a question. Give them time to consider your proposal, and check back with them later in the night to see what they think.
3
Gently touch a Cancer once you begin to feel like they are opening up to you. A cancer enjoys physical affection. Their erogenous zone is their chest. This works better when flirting with a man than a woman. Gently touch a Cancer man on the chest as you are flirting.^{[5]XResearch source}
- You could gently pat him on the chest when he genuinely makes you laugh.
- Gently run your hand along his chest as you briefly walk away, before you return to check in on him.
- While you want to avoid touching a woman’s chest while you are flirting, you can still be physically affectionate and reach out to touch her shoulder or forearm.
4
Make friends with the friends of a Cancer. Cancers are very loyal people and tend to have a small group of very close friends. They will take their friends’ opinion of you to heart. Being respectful and kind to a Cancer’s friends will draw you closer to the inner circle.^{[6]XResearch source}
- Spend some time with the Cancer’s friends when the Cancer walks away. Befriend them on your own.
- Actively listen to what the friends have to say. Make a point to learn their names and remember specific things about who they are and what they do.
- Ask a Cancer about their friends when just the two of you are together. If someone had an important meeting come up, ask how it went. If one of their friends is going through a tough time, follow up and ask the Cancer how that person is doing.

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Communicating with a Cancer

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1
Be straightforward with a Cancer. Let your feelings and intentions be known. If you are looking for a long term relationship, mention it. If you are hoping for a one night stand, let it be known.^{[7]XResearch source}
- On the other hand, do not lead them to believe that this has potential for a relationship if that is not your intention. They will find this out and it will drive them away.
2
Give a Cancer sincere compliments. Like most people, Cancers have a need for approval, but they will see right through a forced or insincere compliment. Even if the compliment is very simple, keep it honest and sincere.^{[8]XExpert SourceMaria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating ExpertExpert Interview. 20 December 2019.} Find something truly unique about their appearance and mention it.^{[9]XResearch source}
- Maybe they have a distinct speck of color in their eyes.
- Something about their style or outfit could intrigue you. Mention their necklace or tattoo and ask them about it. It likely has special meaning to a Cancer.
3
Crack a Cancer’s protective shell. The biggest sticking point for a Cancer is trust. They instinctively protect themselves until you earn their trust. This can be tough to gain in a short amount of time, but starts with complete honesty.
- A Cancer will see right through any pretense.^{[10]XExpert SourceMaria Avgitidis
  Matchmaker & Dating ExpertExpert Interview. 20 December 2019.}
- Speak the truth and do not contradict yourself.
4
Ask Cancers about their family. People born under the sign of Cancer have strong ties to their families. Family always comes first to them and they are likely to have a large family. Cancer women are great mothers.
- Ask if they have brothers and sisters. Take a genuine interest in learning more about their siblings.
- People who are important to a Cancer should be important to you.

Learn How to Date a Cancer with this Expert Series

Cancers are a complex mix of loyalty, romance, and dynamism. It can take patience to attract a Cancer, but it's absolutely worth it. This expert series will help you date the Cancer of your dreams.

Cancer Compatibility: What Zodiac Sign Is Most Compatible with Cancer?

4

Deal with a Moody Cancer Man

5

Understand a Cancer Woman

6

11 Ways to Make a Cancer Woman Jealous

Expert Q&A

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Question
What should I do to avoid making my first date conversation feel like an interview?
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Expert Answer
The purpose of the first date is to go on a second date. It is not to determine if you are going to marry this person. It is to determine if you are having fun, and the best way to do that is to let the conversation happen organically. Remember that it is a conversation on a date and not an interview. So ask questions about their lifestyle or values. For example, you can ask, What are you doing this weekend? What did you do last summer?
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Question
How can I know whether I am getting the correct response while flirting?
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Expert Answer
Observe the body language of the person with whom you are flirting. If they only keep nodding and do not add to the conversation or move back, it means you are not saying the right things and getting the correct response from them.
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How can I make my first date more enjoyable?
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmaker & Dating Expert
Expert Answer
To make your date more enjoyable, show up on time, do not pretend, and be yourself. Do not get distracted by your phone. Look at the good qualities of the other person. Give attention to the nice things you like about them instead of those that you do not.
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Tips

Allow for plenty of time for him or her to feel familiar with you. Cancer people may be timid initially, but that doesn't mean they aren't interested in you, or the topic of discussion.
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Watch for hints. Rarely will Cancers state what they're thinking or feeling directly at that moment. Cancers might not say things out loud much at first, but often their facial expression and body language are an open book.
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Be patient. It may take a bit for a Cancer to come out of their protective shell. Or perhaps in order to feel established in the conversation they'll launch into a somewhat long-winded explanation or memory of some kind. You can learn quite a bit about a Cancer when they do this, so have patience and listen closely.
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Warnings

Do not insult their family, no matter how much they may complain about it.
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Don't lie and cheat on them. They're very volatile and sensitive people, and you do not want to face their explosive anger.
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Further, don't insult their heritage or country, either. Cancers are deeply patriotic, and quickly take offense to any perceived mockery or shame.
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