Download ArticleDownload ArticleThis article was co-authored by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC and by How.com.vn staff writer, Eric McClure. Moshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
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If you or your partner are going to be moving in the near future, you may be discussing the potential of a long-distance relationship. If your partner isn’t totally sure they want to be long-term or you haven’t talked about it yet, strategizing how you lay out your case is important. Keep in mind, you cannot argue your way into getting what you want here, as hard as that may be to hear. The best you can do is express your love, explain why you want to be long-distance, and hope they make the right decision. We’ll tell you everything you need to know to increase your chances of success here.
Steps
Expert Q&A
- QuestionShould you talk everyday in a long distance relationship?
Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCCMoshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
Relationship TherapistWhile you don't have to talk every day, it's important to communicate often. Communication indicates that you are an important part of the other person’s life. Update your partner on your life, even simple and mundane happenings. Use technology to video chat, call, and send each other pictures, audio clips, and videos. Be clear about how often you want to communicate. - QuestionWhat kills long-distance relationships?Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCCMoshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
Relationship TherapistOne thing that kills long-distance relationships is lack of trust. The key to every relationship is trust. It is even more critical in a long-distance relationship. Have faith in your partner and in your relationship. Be faithful and positive and define your commitment in a practical way. - QuestionIs it possible to start a relationship long distance?Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCCMoshe Ratson is the Executive Director of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a coaching and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is an International Coach Federation accredited Professional Certified Coach (PCC). He received his MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona College. Moshe is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), and a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF).
Relationship TherapistYes, as long as you maintain a shared goal and vision. A common vision is a key motivating factor to endure the difficult moments in a long-distance relationship. Before you get into a long-distance relationship, you should have a shared vision about your relationship and understand that you are willing to accept the consequences of long-distance.
Tips
References
- ↑ https://time.com/5316307/best-long-distance-relationship-tips-experts/
- ↑ https://www.vice.com/en/article/pkejqm/how-to-talk-to-your-partner-about-your-future-together-during-coronavirus-pandemic
- ↑ https://bestlifeonline.com/long-distance-relationships-secrets/
- ↑ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23763685/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5635840/
- ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5635840/
- ↑ https://fivethirtyeight.com/features/are-long-distance-relationships-doomed/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/why-bad-looks-good/201903/the-advantages-long-distance-relationships
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2020/07/how-to-actually-change-someones-mind
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/life-refracted/201612/13-challenges-and-opportunities-in-long-distance-love
- ↑ https://bestlifeonline.com/long-distance-relationships-secrets/
- ↑ https://time.com/5316307/best-long-distance-relationship-tips-experts/
- ↑ https://bestlifeonline.com/long-distance-relationships-secrets/
- ↑ https://www.thecut.com/article/long-distance-relationship.html
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/202109/7-reasons-exes-get-back-together/
About This Article
It can be hard if your partner’s reluctant to try a long-distance relationship, but there are a few ways you can help convince them. Firstly, tell them how much you love them and that you can see a happy future between you. You can also explain how well you support each other, and how this won’t change even with the extra distance. If you both want to live together when you’re older and maybe even have a family, suggest to your partner that spending a year or so apart might not be so bad in the long run. Don’t forget that you can still schedule time to talk regularly and even visit each other sometimes. If your partner still doesn’t want to try a long-distance relationship, it might be best for you to go your separate ways and find happiness without them. For more tips from our Relationships co-author, including how to maintain the romance in a long-distance relationship, read on.
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