How to Support an Autistic Person During Autism Awareness Month

April can be a challenging month for autistic people, who face disaster rhetoric, praise for organizations that hurt them, calls for cures, and routine dehumanization. This can take a toll on their overall mental health.^{[1]XResearch source} One survey finds that 56% of autistics say awareness campaigns harm their mental health, 59% say their self-image has been harmed, and 62% say that awareness campaigns have caused mental health episodes.^{[2]XResearch source}^{[3]XResearch source} Here is how to help protect their self-esteem and keep their spirits high.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Discussing Autism

1
Prepare yourself first. Stop listening to parent groups that blame autism and autistic people for everything.^{[4]XResearch source} Read from autistic adults about how to support your loved one. Stay away from controversial groups, such as Autism Speaks, that are known for treating autistic people like burdens.^{[5]XTrustworthy SourceAustistic Self Advocacy NetworkNonprofit organization run by and for individuals on the autism spectrum that empowers autistic people through education and public advocacyGo to source}^{[6]XTrustworthy SourceAutistic Women & Nonbinary NetworkNonprofit organization providing community, support, and resources for Autistic women, girls, nonbinary people, and those identifying as other marginalized genders.Go to source}^{[7]XResearch source} Refuse to let overly negative groups form your opinion of your loved one.
- Seeing these groups get praise, attention, and donations can be hard for autistic people.
2
Limit general media exposure, particularly regarding autism awareness. Turn off the TV during walks "for autism," put the newspaper out of sight, and encourage them to be careful about the internet. Autism awareness messages will only upset them.
- Even events that seem neutral/positive in their coverage can be upsetting if they use puzzle piece imagery^{[8]XResearch source}^{[9]XResearch source}^{[10]XResearch source} or are sponsored by Autism Speaks.^{[11]XResearch source}
Tip: If your loved one does online advocacy, encourage them to take breaks or a day-long "social media cleanse" if it becomes too upsetting. Advocacy is good, but it's not more important than their mental health.
3
Celebrate Autism Acceptance Month instead. This April event celebrates diversity, encouraging autistic people to be themselves and pushing for support and understanding rather than false or eugenic "cures."^{[12]XResearch source} Show your autistic loved one articles about this month, and let them see people promoting acceptance.
- Try dressing in #RedInstead together.
- Use the neurodiversity symbol.
- Go to (or organize!) local autism acceptance events and discuss acceptance in your community.
4
Find media and gifts devoted to autism acceptance. Did you find a picture celebrating differences? Show it to them. Is there an adorable autism acceptance T-shirt online? Buy it in their size. This will help reaffirm your acceptance of them and help them feel proud of their identity.
- Puzzle piece motifs have negative associations^{[13]XTrustworthy SourcePubMed CentralJournal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of HealthGo to source} and are used by many groups that stigmatize autism.^{[14]XResearch source}
- "Light It Up Blue" is from Autism Speaks.^{[15]XResearch source} Skip that.
- Autism acceptance proponents tend to use infinity signs (which symbolize neurodiversity^{[16]XResearch source}), rainbows, and red for #RedInstead.
5
Paint autism in a neutral or positive light. Autistic people are used to hearing that their disability is an epidemic,^{[17]XResearch source} a disaster,^{[18]XTrustworthy SourceAustistic Self Advocacy NetworkNonprofit organization run by and for individuals on the autism spectrum that empowers autistic people through education and public advocacyGo to source} a horrible burden.^{[19]XResearch source} Try telling them that their stimming is cute or commenting positively on their special interest.
6
Listen to autistic adults. The autistic community can offer the clearest perspective, and can give you plenty of suggestions for supporting your loved one.^{[20]XTrustworthy SourceAutistic Women & Nonbinary NetworkNonprofit organization providing community, support, and resources for Autistic women, girls, nonbinary people, and those identifying as other marginalized genders.Go to source}^{[21]XResearch source[PLOS: Autism Awareness is Not Enough: Here's How to Change the World] (in-depth article featuring advice from many autistic adults)}
7
Help them network with other autistic people. Seeing others like them can help their self-esteem, and they can relate to each other more easily.
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Part 2

Part 2 of 2:

Providing Emotional Support

Autistic people who feel accepted, and do not try to "camouflage" by hiding themselves, are less likely to suffer health problems like depression.^{[22]XResearch source}

1
Make it very clear that you accept them for who they are. Respect their needs and preferences, and allow them to have fun and be themselves. Show them that you're here to help and support them, not to extinguish or fit them into the mold of non-autistic.
- Help them feel comfortable being themselves around you, even if it means it's a little "odd."
- Stand up for them if people tell them to act like a non-autistic person.
2
Set aside extra time to do things together. Play with toys on the floor, bead bracelets, or talk about a shared topic of interest. Simply being there can help them feel supported.
- Positive interactions with loved ones can support their mental health and distract them from negativity in the news.
3
Praise their strengths. This will help them remember that they are more than a list of deficits. Compliment their skill with a paintbrush, their patience towards their younger brother, or their love of learning. This will help keep their self-esteem afloat.
4
Engage with their special interests and therapy activities. Ask them about how your car works or offer to play catch together to help their motor skills. This will help them feel that you love all of them, including the autistic parts.
5
Keep an eye on their emotional state. Many autistic people struggle with self-esteem. They're at increased risk for anxiety, depression, and suicide.^{[23]XTrustworthy SourcePubMed CentralJournal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of HealthGo to source}^{[24]XResearch source}^{[25]XResearch source} Rhetoric describing autism as a tragic, family-destroying calamity can worsen their mental health. Get medical help if you are concerned about your loved one's wellbeing.
- Fighting stigma online is brave, but it can also take a toll. Check in on an autistic person who is active with autism advocacy on social media. They may get exposed to a lot of negative content and prejudiced people.
6
Offer plenty of reassurance. Autism Awareness Month often comes with rhetoric confirming autistic people's fears that they are burdens.^{[26]XResearch source}^{[27]XResearch source} Use your words and actions to make a strong statement otherwise.^{[28]XTrustworthy SourceAustistic Self Advocacy NetworkNonprofit organization run by and for individuals on the autism spectrum that empowers autistic people through education and public advocacyGo to source}
- Use this month to practice your patience and listening skills.
- Give them ability-appropriate opportunities to help out and feel useful.
- Encourage their strengths and applaud their successes.
7
Listen to their struggles. You can do your best, but if they pay attention on social media or the news, then the anti-autism rhetoric is likely to hurt. Let them voice their feelings and assure them that the awful stereotypes and messages are wrong. They are okay the way they are.
- Validate their feelings.
- It's okay if you need to pause to think before responding. Autistic people understand, and this is a difficult problem with no easy answers.
- It's okay to simply say "I'm so sorry to hear that" and "That's too bad." Sometimes that's all you can say.
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Warnings

Never discourage their stimming. An autistic person's stimming is part of them and should only be redirected if it is harming the person or another person.
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