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This article was co-authored by Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM. Shannon O'Brien is the Founder and Principal Advisor of Whole U. (a career and life strategy consultancy based in Boston, MA). Through advising, workshops and e-learning Whole U. empowers people to pursue their life's work and live a balanced, purposeful life. Shannon has been ranked as the #1 Career Coach and #1 Life Coach in Boston, MA by Yelp reviewers. She has been featured on Boston.com, Boldfacers, and the UR Business Network. She received a Master's of Technology, Innovation, & Education from Harvard University.
This article has been viewed 80,332 times.
While making business small-talk may seem nerve-wracking at first, we're here to help you feel comfortable chatting it up in any setting. Keep reading for tips on how to introduce yourself, strike up a conversation, and make meaningful connections while you're networking!
Steps
Introduce and initiate.[1] Go ahead and initiate with a hello! Even if you recognize, or slightly know someone, re-introduce yourself. Be aware of how he introduces himself (you may know him as Charles, but maybe he goes by Chuck) and use his name throughout your interaction. This will help you remember it in the long run and also establish a personal connection. By taking ownership and initiating a conversation, you will feel more in control to drive the direction of the exchange.
Use an icebreaker. An icebreaker not only provides a way to meet new people, but also helps jump start conversations. For example, using an icebreaker such as “Tell me about your conference last week...” instead of simply saying hello can lead to a fruitful conversation, rather than an uncomfortable silence. Some other valuable icebreakers you might use are:- “Bring me up to date on your latest project.”
- “What do you find to be the most enjoyable aspect of your job?”
- “Tell me about your history with ________.”
- “How did you come to find yourself in the health care field?”
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Express interest and make an effort. You have to be interested if you want to be interesting. Part of your job as a conversation starter is to get the other person to talk. Listen to what your conversational partner is saying and ask relevant follow-up questions. Take cues from them and make a mental list of questions you can ask to get them to elaborate. If you're talking to Mary in the marketing department, ask what she's working on, what the new marketing strategies are, how she is impacted by the new branding campaign. This is a great way to brainstorm about future projects, find out about potential clients or build a lasting business relationship. That being said, be sure not to ask so many questions that you come off as an interrogator. There should be a flow and balance when interacting.
Find common ground. Whether you're chatting with a new co-worker or a business function speaker, it's important to stay on a related topic.[2] As long as you stay on a subject you are both familiar with – like your specific field or the day's event – you'll be able to communicate easily. Why were you in the setting you're in? Did you find today's seminar helpful? Wasn't the memo this week interesting? Avoid controversial topics like politics, religion, personal relationships and family issues and stick to what you both know is applicable.
Overcome pregnant pauses. It's up to you to keep the conversation going if there are some uncomfortable pauses. Use your setting for ideas to reinvigorate the discussion. Say, “It's great having our sales conference in a warm, tropical place. Have you been to Mexico before?” Use pauses as an opportunity to compliment your international counterpart. Try, “I'm impressed with what you're doing for our Asian business. You've made some huge improvements in our technology department over there.” This is also a great time to interject with any material you've previously prepared.
Establish personal boundaries. It's fine if you want to let someone know where you went to college or how many children you have, but be mindful of how much personal information you provide. Sure, your relationship could benefit if you find out both your wives are attorneys, but evaluate the value of the subject matter and its impact on the rapport. If the dialogue gets too sidetracked into personal details, the business-networking angle can become lost. Revealing too many personal details in a business setting can be inappropriate. Use your best judgment to maximize the content of the conversation.
Exit thoughtfully. In many business situations, it's important to make contact with several people and move around a room. If you are in management it is always good to make contact and interact with as many on the team as possible. And sometimes, there is just a good time to move on. Find an appropriate point in the conversation to make an exit. Say, “I really enjoyed talking to you about today's meeting. I have your card and I'll be in touch with you this week so we can discuss it further.” Make a plan that is actionable and give a specific time when you'll follow up. Most importantly, if you say you're going to do something, do it!Advertisement
Expert Q&A
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- QuestionHow can I be more confident when networking?
Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdMShannon O'Brien is the Founder and Principal Advisor of Whole U. (a career and life strategy consultancy based in Boston, MA). Through advising, workshops and e-learning Whole U. empowers people to pursue their life's work and live a balanced, purposeful life. Shannon has been ranked as the #1 Career Coach and #1 Life Coach in Boston, MA by Yelp reviewers. She has been featured on Boston.com, Boldfacers, and the UR Business Network. She received a Master's of Technology, Innovation, & Education from Harvard University.
Life & Career CoachIt can feel uncomfortable to network, but try to think of it as something that is exhilarating, positive, and fun rather than scary. Switching your mentality to see it as making friends and building connections can help.
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Tips
- Make eye contact and be aware of body language[3]Thanks
- Appear confident, but not cockyThanks
- Be up to speed on pop culture so you can draw on it if there is a lull in conversationThanks
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References
- ↑ Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM. Life & Career Coach. Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
- ↑ Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM. Life & Career Coach. Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
- ↑ Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM. Life & Career Coach. Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
- Author and keynote speaker Debra Fine began her career as an engineer, not a field that chit-chatters usually pursue. In fact, most engineers are more comfortable with computers than people. When Fine did attend social functions, she often lurked in corners, avoiding conversation at all costs. Debra designs her presentations and books (Hyperion) for people who feel the way she used to. She teaches conversation skills and networking techniques that help in developing business and social relationships. Debra's newly released Beyond Texting The Fine Art of Face to Face Communication for Teenagers (Canon) joins her others in the Fine Art series: The Fine Art of the Big Talk: How to Win Clients, Deliver Great Presentations, and Solve Conflicts at Work (Hachette) and The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep It Going, Build Networking Skills—and Leave a Positive Impression (Hachette) all published and translated in over 2 dozen countries around the world.
- Debra is 20+ year member of the National Speakers Association and has presented her programs to over a thousand groups around the world for clients that include General Electric, Lockheed Martin, Texas Association of School Boards, Cisco Systems, Alaska Forum on the Environment, American Bar Association, Google, Credit Suisse and New York University Stern Graduate School of Business. She currently maintains a speaking schedule of an average of 90 to 100 presentations per year.
- Additional information about Debra and her work can be viewed at www.DebraFine.com.
About this article
Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM
Life & Career Coach
This article was co-authored by Shannon O'Brien, MA, EdM. Shannon O'Brien is the Founder and Principal Advisor of Whole U. (a career and life strategy consultancy based in Boston, MA). Through advising, workshops and e-learning Whole U. empowers people to pursue their life's work and live a balanced, purposeful life. Shannon has been ranked as the #1 Career Coach and #1 Life Coach in Boston, MA by Yelp reviewers. She has been featured on Boston.com, Boldfacers, and the UR Business Network. She received a Master's of Technology, Innovation, & Education from Harvard University. This article has been viewed 80,332 times.
Co-authors: 11
Updated: September 20, 2022
Views: 80,332
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 80,332 times.
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