This article was co-authored by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW and by How.com.vn staff writer, Amber Crain. Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is the author of “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” which details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each. She is also the award-winning and best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and was a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
There are 11 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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Do you have a difficult time connecting physically or sexually with others? Fear of physical intimacy is a lot more common than you think, and there are lots of reasons why you might develop it. In this article, we'll walk you through the symptoms and causes, and we'll also explain how this fear may be impacting your life. Then, we'll cover diagnosis and treatment options so you can take steps to put this fear behind you once and for all.
This article is based on an interview with our relationship expert, Kelli Miller, licensed pyschotherapist and award-winning author. Check out the full interview here.
Steps
How.com.vn Quiz: Do I Have Abandonment Issues?
Expert Q&A
- QuestionHow can I stop being so anxious about sex?Maria AvgitidisMaria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with modern relationship psychology and search techniques to ensure her professional clientele are introduced to their ultimate match. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice, and Thrillist.
Matchmaker & Dating ExpertRemind yourself that sex isn't always going to be perfect the first time you have it with someone! Sex is very exploratory since you're getting to know someone new. - QuestionHow do I help my partner with fear of intimacy?Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSWKelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is the author of “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” which details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each. She is also the award-winning and best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and was a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
PsychotherapistGive them the space to really communicate what they're feeling. There's a lot of different reasons someone might have a fear of physical intimacy, so it's important that you understand where your partner is coming from.
Tips
- If your partner has a fear of physical intimacy, support them by talking openly with them about what's causing their fear. It's also important to be patient with your partner as they work through their feelings and past experiences. Be compassionate and try to put yourself in their shoes. If you're struggling, consider speaking to a therapist. Your feelings matter, too.[22]Thanks
References
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.
- ↑ https://www.rtor.org/2019/06/28/mental-health-and-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.psychalive.org/fear-of-abandonment/
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.
- ↑ https://livingwell.org.au/relationships/partners-sexual-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/recovering-from-rape-and-sexual-trauma.htm
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/anxiety/genophobia-fear-of-sex
- ↑ https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/phobias/overview/
- ↑ https://www.rtor.org/2019/06/28/mental-health-and-intimacy/
- ↑ https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9888-body-dysmorphic-disorder
- ↑ https://www.rtor.org/2019/06/28/mental-health-and-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.nctsn.org/what-is-child-trauma/about-child-trauma
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 11 June 2020.
- ↑ https://livingwell.org.au/relationships/partners-sexual-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.psychalive.org/5-strategies-for-dealing-with-your-partners-fear-of-intimacy/
- ↑ https://livingwell.org.au/relationships/partners-sexual-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.psychalive.org/fear-of-abandonment/
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/recovering-from-rape-and-sexual-trauma.htm
- ↑ https://livingwell.org.au/relationships/partners-sexual-intimacy/
- ↑ https://www.psychalive.org/5-strategies-for-dealing-with-your-partners-fear-of-intimacy/
- ↑ Maria Avgitidis. Matchmaker & Dating Expert. Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
- ↑ https://www.psychalive.org/5-strategies-for-dealing-with-your-partners-fear-of-intimacy/
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