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In a cluttered world full of anxiety and stress, it is easy to feel that you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. You fill up your calendar and rush from one activity to another as if taking time to rest and reflect is forbidden. You then find yourself asking why life is so stressful and hard. The key to disengaging from the fast pace and stress is to take the time to develop and maintain a positive outlook on life. Positivity may not complete your task list, but it will change how you move through it and through life.

Part 1
Part 1 of 2:

Being Happy About Yourself

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  1. How.com.vn English: Step 1 Realise that you’re unique and one of a kind.
    You were created to make a mark in this life and not just born to survive.
  2. How.com.vn English: Step 2 Remind yourself that your presence is a present to the world.
    You may not realize it but one way or another, someone feels so blessed with your existence. So stop saying you’re nobody.
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  3. How.com.vn English: Step 3 Remember that your life can be just what you want it to be.
    Most of life is a choice, having the freedom to act and decide on your own. Start deciding and stop complaining.
  4. How.com.vn English: Step 4 Take the days one at a time.
    Rushing isn’t all beneficial.Take time to smell the flowers. Don’t overdo yourself. Learn to appreciate life today, for tomorrow, you may not have the chance to do so.[1]
  5. How.com.vn English: Step 5 Count your blessings, not your troubles.
    There are two types of people: proactive and reactive. The reactive always see the trouble and blames the circumstance on other people, while proactive see troubles as a bridge to success. Which are you?
  6. How.com.vn English: Step 6 Remind yourself that within you are so many answers.
    One of the big disadvantages of a hurried lifestyle is the lack of meditation or reflection. We are too busy, too preoccupied. But if you really want to find true happiness in this life, you have to be still, to quiet your mind so you can hear your heart.
  7. How.com.vn English: Step 7 Have courage and be strong.
    Knowing that life is imperfect gives you enough space to expect it to be hard. You have to accept that life’s circumstance is not ALWAYS within our control and all you can do is accept, understand and keep moving forward. Life is 99% choice and 1% chance.
  8. How.com.vn English: Step 8 Know that you’ll make it through whatever comes along.
    In times of affliction, it can be tough to see the lighter side. But do always remember, that all storms have endings. Just keep looking forward.
  9. How.com.vn English: Step 9 Remind yourself that there are so many dreams waiting to be realized.
    A goal without action is nothing but a dream. It’s very good to know what you want and set your plans. However, if it’s only written, it can’t be realized. You have to take action. You have to wake up and stand up.[2]
  10. How.com.vn English: Step 10 Don't leave things to chance.
    Remember, life is 99% choice and 1% chance.We are in control of our life 99% of the time and yet a lot of us give this all to chances. We let things happen instead of making it happen.
  11. How.com.vn English: Step 11 Don't limit yourself.
    One of the differences between achievers and non-achievers is the size of their dreams. Big people achieve big dreams because they think big. The same is true for small people. They achieve smaller dreams because they think small.The key is to have confidence in oneself and think BIG!
  12. How.com.vn English: Step 12 Stop worrying.
    Worry is a complete waste of energy. Even how much you think about it over and over, it will not solve anything. Worry gives you nothing but bad feelings.
  13. How.com.vn English: Step 13 Remember that the longer you carry a problem, the heavier it gets.
    When faced with bad situations or problems, a lot of us leave it behind undecided. We may think that the safest solution is leaving it to chances. However, indecision does not solve the problem, it just gives you temporary relief. But sooner or later, you will feel its impact. Most of the time, it’s bigger than the original. Don’t avoid problems, instead, be brave enough to face and solve it so you can move forward in life. Stop being a coward! Instead of investing your time thinking of the problem, shift your thoughts on how you can solve it.
  14. How.com.vn English: Step 14 Live a life of serenity, not regrets.
    People who seldom succeed in life are those who live in the shadow of the past. They cling to too much of what they used to have that they seldom adapt and move forward in life. Remember that you can no longer alter what happened in the past but you can create your future. Accept what happened and move on.
  15. How.com.vn English: Step 15 Do ordinary things in an extraordinary way.
    Every day, you do the same thing, like a cycle that just goes round and round. You get too lax that you find life too boring. But instead of focusing on the negative feeling of boredom, why not take charge and create a change. Sometimes, change does not only happen by surprise. You have the capacity to create change. And why not do it now? Who knows, it might give you the big break you’ve been dreaming of.
  16. How.com.vn English: Step 16 Don't take yourself too seriously.
    Because no one else does. The only person that’s burdened when you are too serious is you. Keep a mature mind but a young heart. Smile, you look better when you do.
  17. Step 17 "Invest in a good friendship.
    True friendship lasts forever. You may not see them often but when friendship is true, even how time and distance separates you, true friends are the ones that stay with you. If you have found this type of friend, care and treasure them. For it’s one of the best gifts you will ever receive in your life.
  18. How.com.vn English: Step 18 Reach for your peak, your goal, your prize.
    As long as you’re alive, you have all the chance to achieve your goal. Don’t get discouraged by past failures. Keep striving. Remember, success comes from multiple failures. Those who win have finished the race.
  19. Step 19 "Take the time to wish upon a star.
    Have faith in your dreams until you achieve it. Nothing is impossible when you believe.
  20. How.com.vn English: Step 20 Remember that it’s never too late.
    Often times we resist change because we think that it’s too late for us to change. Remember that we all have countless chances in this life. You just have to accept change.
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Part 2
Part 2 of 2:

Compare Your Achievements to Your Shortcomings

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  1. How.com.vn English: Step 1 Write what you wanted to have achieved at this point in your life.
    Really think about it. Go back as far as you remember, all the things you dreamed about. This can include your ambitions for your family life, career, finances, hobbies and awards, anything! If you have any old wish books or bucket lists reread them and add them to your notebook. You will know when you're done when you feel relief and probably a little frustration or even anger. Ok, stop...put the emotions on the side for now.[3]
  2. How.com.vn English: Step 2 Make a note of everything you have accomplished or done.
    Everything! If you were a good friend, supported an ill friend or family member, got a new job that you enjoy, or made new friends on holiday, write it down! Whatever it is write it down. Things that you don't even think are important, like returning a lost wallet or helping someone cross the road, write it down. When you're done you should feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. You feel lighter. If at any point in time you remember something else, add it!
  3. How.com.vn English: Step 3 Pull out both lists, side by side.
    Start reading your first list, do you see anything on the other list that looks familiar? Keep reading and comparing. Keep doing that, you will see that what you actually have done is pretty great. Some of the things on your past ambitions list probably seem silly now as well, things like wanting to be an astronaut are almost impossible for anybody to achieve.
  4. How.com.vn English: Step 4 Pick a past ambition.
    Google it, get as much information on it as possible. Keep notes on it if you need to. Research it for at least a week. After the week has passed do you still want to do it? If you do now you need to figure out how you will do it. If not, well pick the next thing on your list and do the same again. Most things you will find look good, but when you see what's actually involved aren't quite so appealing anymore. Cross off your past ambitions one by one as you reject the idea.
  5. How.com.vn English: Step 5 Remember life is a journey with plenty of roads to take.
    Never feel guilty about not doing something.[4] Give yourself a pat on the back for everything you have done and all the things that you still want to do. Enjoy the little things. Watch a baby crack up when someone is making weird faces at it. Watch a puppy chasing a duck...whatever. Feel good about yourself and all that you are. You are a special being!
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Expert Q&A

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  • Question
    How do I change my negative outlook on life?
    How.com.vn English: Alexandra Janelli
    Alexandra Janelli
    Anxiety and Stress Management Coach
    Alexandra Janelli is a Certified Hypnotherapist, Anxiety & Stress Management Coach, and owner and founder of Modrn Sanctuary, a holistic health and wellness facility in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. With over 10 years of experience, Alexandra specializes in helping clients push through their roadblocks to achieve their goals using her hypnotherapeutic approach. Alexandra holds a BS from the University of Miami. She graduated from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute with an Advanced Training Graduate Diploma in Hypnotherapy and Handwriting Analysis. Alexandra is also a Certified Life Coach from the iPEC Coach Training Program. She has worked with Academy Award Nominee Actors, world-renowned photographers, singers, top-level executives, and professionals across many sectors of business. Alexandra has been featured on MTV, Elle Magazine, Oprah Magazine, Men's Fitness, Swell City Guide, Dossier Journal, The New Yorker, and Time Out Chicago.
    How.com.vn English: Alexandra Janelli
    Anxiety and Stress Management Coach
    Expert Answer
    Make sure that you understand what your goal is. If you have a more positive mindset, then good things will happen, right? That has to be inspiring enough for you to at least try being positive. Keep in mind that whenever you're changing the neuroplasticity of the mind, you'll have to "try things on" first, like a pair of shoes. You need to have an awareness that you're being negative if you want to go in a positive direction. From there, it's just "trying on" that mindset—what would it feel like if you were more positive? Your thoughts and emotions would change, and then maybe your actions would change. You're going to slowly see that as you begin to evolve and adapt to that new mindset.
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      About This Article

      How.com.vn English: Alexandra Janelli
      Co-authored by:
      Anxiety and Stress Management Coach
      This article was co-authored by Alexandra Janelli. Alexandra Janelli is a Certified Hypnotherapist, Anxiety & Stress Management Coach, and owner and founder of Modrn Sanctuary, a holistic health and wellness facility in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. With over 10 years of experience, Alexandra specializes in helping clients push through their roadblocks to achieve their goals using her hypnotherapeutic approach. Alexandra holds a BS from the University of Miami. She graduated from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute with an Advanced Training Graduate Diploma in Hypnotherapy and Handwriting Analysis. Alexandra is also a Certified Life Coach from the iPEC Coach Training Program. She has worked with Academy Award Nominee Actors, world-renowned photographers, singers, top-level executives, and professionals across many sectors of business. Alexandra has been featured on MTV, Elle Magazine, Oprah Magazine, Men's Fitness, Swell City Guide, Dossier Journal, The New Yorker, and Time Out Chicago. This article has been viewed 107,548 times.
      How helpful is this?
      Co-authors: 15
      Updated: April 19, 2024
      Views: 107,548
      Categories: Optimism
      Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 107,548 times.

      Reader Success Stories

      • How.com.vn English: Michele Turner

        Michele Turner

        Jul 17, 2017

        "What a great reminder as to what is really important in life!"
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