Download ArticleLearn how to rehome your dog and cope with giving up a pet
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This article was co-authored by Cameron Thompsen. Cameron Thompsen is a Dog Trainer and Human Coach, as well as the Owner and Founder of Hope2K9 Foundation. With nearly two decades of experience, she specializes in working with dogs and their owners on behavior issues ranging from severe anxiety, reactivity, as well as aggression and fear-based problems. She works with all dogs at Hope2K9 so that they are fully trained before adoption, and provides lifelong support to dog owners after adoption.
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It's very hard to give a dog away that you love. You might have to give your dog away because a family member develops pet allergies or because you’re moving to a new place that doesn’t allow dogs. Whatever the reason, giving away your dog is a hard decision that you must make carefully in order to figure out the best thing to do for all parties involved.
Things You Should Know
- Think about your reasoning and come up with any alternative solutions. If you exhaust all possible options, tell your family what you're doing.
- Find a new home for your dog by asking around or advertising online. Interview potential adopters so you know your dog is going to a good home.
- Spend some time with your dog and take a few moments to say goodbye before you leave.
Steps
Discuss the reasons. Take some time to think about why you have arrived at the decision to give your dog away. Remember that dogs are a lot of responsibility, but you should try to keep your commitment as a pet owner as much as you can. Talk to the other people who live in your house and make sure everyone is clear about the reasons and still thinks giving the dog away is the best solution.[1]- Some reasons that you might be considering giving up your dog include family member allergies, living arrangement restrictions, aggressive dog behavior, or not having enough time to give the dog the attention it needs.
Think about alternative solutions. If you are sad about giving away your dog, try to exhaust all possible options before deciding to go that route. Brainstorm with your family members about what you could do instead of giving the dog away.[2]- If a family member has allergies, consider allergy medications.
- Try to talk to your landlord about making special allowances for your pet. Perhaps you could offer to pay an extra pet deposit.
- If your pet is destructive, think about taking the dog to obedience training. As you have already built the connection with the dog, you might have a better chance to succeed than any potential new owner. If the behaviors issues get resolved as a result, the dog will be able to remain with you. Or consider putting the dog in a crate while you’re gone during the day as long as it is only for a few hours at a time.
- If you don’t have enough time to spend with your dog, consider taking it to doggie daycare during the day. Or ask some of your friends or relatives to help out with watching the dog while you’re at work. You could also consider hiring a dog sitter.
- If you no longer have financial means to keep the dog, try to contact your local Humane Society or another group or non-profit organization that provide support for dog owners. You may be able to get dog food and veterinary care at no cost or low cost.
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Inform everyone involved. It's very hard to give away a family pet, but sometimes there are reasons why you have to do these things. Start (if you have kids) with telling your kids that you have to give the family dog away so they know what you are doing. The children will be upset about this, but giving them a little time to come to terms with the decision before you give the dog away may help your child cope with their emotions about the situation.- Tell your children or other family members that you don’t want to get rid of the dog, but that there is no other option. Let them express how they feel and talk about the situation with them.
- Try saying something like, “You know how much we all love Fido, but, unfortunately, we are going to have to give him away. The new landlord doesn’t allow pets and there is no way for us to move to another place. I know this is a sad thing, but we will find Fido a good home where he can be happy.”
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Ask around. Take some time to ask your friends, family, neighbors, and coworkers if they, or anyone they know and trust, would be interested in adopting your dog. You will ultimately feel more comfortable giving your dog to someone you already know will take good care of your pet.- Make sure they have the time to dedicate to a pet and enough room for the dog in their home.
- You could also ask your veterinarian for recommendations. They might know of someone who would be interested in adopting your dog.
Advertise your pet. Look for a caring, good home for your dog by advertising your pet in various ways. Make a private post on your social media accounts that only your friends can see. Put up fliers at local pet stores and veterinarian offices. Include a picture of your dog and some information about what kind of personality the dog has.[3]- You may want to avoid advertising online (unless it is a private post that only your friends and acquaintances can see) because there are many scams and people who want to adopt dogs for fighting, re-selling, or other unfortunate reasons. You want to avoid these kinds of inquiries.
Interview potential adopters. When you find someone who is interested in adopting your pet (especially if you don’t know them already), it’s important to ask them a few questions to figure out if they would be a good fit for your pet. You want to make sure they have the kind of home you want your pet to live in and that you are confident they would be able to care for your pet appropriately.- For example, if you know your dog is not very good with children, you’ll want to inform the potential adopters about this fact and make sure they don’t have any small children in their home.
- Be sure to ask if new owners have enough time to walk, train, and care for the dog. If they don't, look for some other owners. Remember that you are responsible for finding a good home for your dog.
Set the date. Once you have found an adopter that you are comfortable with, agree on a date for your dog to go to its new home. Make sure that the date works for both parties (you and the adopters) and agree on who will be transporting the dog.- Be sure to bring all of your dog’s possessions with you to its new home. This includes things like old toys, food dishes, dog bed, leash, and any bags of food you may have.
Use animal shelters as a last resort. Giving your dog up to an animal shelter should be an absolute last option when you have no other choice. Your dog may not get the attention and care it needs at an animal shelter because of the problems with funding and lack of staff members that many shelters deal with on a daily basis. And it is very likely that the dog will stay there for weeks before being adopted, if it even gets adopted at all.[4]- If you have a purebred dog, contact a non-profit rescue for the specific breed. They are usually well-equipped to assess your dog and have good connections with local rescue partners to find a new home for it.
- The shelter environment can be very stressful for a dog. However, if your situation is very urgent, or if the dog is dangerous, this may be your best option.
- Many animal shelters are kill shelters, which means that they euthanize animals who are not adopted after a certain amount of time. You don’t want that to happen to your family pet, so make sure you inquire about the shelter’s euthanization policies before you hand over your dog. You only want to give your dog to a no-kill shelter.
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Take some time to be with your dog before you give it away. Sit down with your family and take turns petting it and loving on it. Talk about why you are giving the dog away. These conversations will help your family come to terms with losing their beloved pet. Make sure everyone has a chance to say goodbye to the dog.[5]- Spending quality time with the dog before it goes will give everyone a chance to say goodbye and to feel a little bit better about the situation.
- But be careful not to go too overboard with this process. If you are too overly emotional, the dog may sense something is wrong and feel anxious and upset.
Act normally towards the dog. Remember that the dog doesn’t deserve to be treated poorly just because you have to give it away. It's okay to be sad, but it isn't okay to take out your emotions on the dog in a negative way. Explain to your family (especially if you have kids) that your dog will have good new home, and it's important to act normally for the dog since dogs live in the moment.- Until the dog leaves for its new home, it is still part of your family. Treat the dog with love and kindness even if it is hard for you to do because you are sad it is leaving.
Say goodbye. When the farewell time comes, be ready. Spend some time saying goodbye to your dog and giving it a proper sending off. Be happy that your dog will have a good new family. Hug the dog and be confident that you have done the right thing.[6]- Let the dog take its treats, toys, dog bed, and any other possessions you bought the dog to its new home so that it will make the transition a bit easier on your pup.
Deal with your grief. It’s normal to expect that you will be sad after you give your dog away. Try to deal with your grief by talking about it to your friends and family or by spending time with other animals in your life (like your best friend’s pet or your neighbor’s dog).[7]- You may also want to consider going to counseling or seeking the help of a grief support group if the pain seems unmanageable or if it lasts a long time.
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Community Q&A
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- QuestionWill my dog that loves me a lot and has been with me for 8 months miss me?
Community AnswerYes, it will, but most likely it will become attached to its new owner and be very fond of them as well. Dogs are very good at adapting to new situations. - QuestionIs it good to check in on how my dog is doing every once in a while, even when I do not see my dog?
Community AnswerIt depends. On one hand, it's good to keep up with how they are doing. However, you should consider your relationship with their new owner(s). - QuestionHow will my dog react to their new owner?
Community AnswerYour dog might be sad at first and take some time to adjust to their new owner, but over time they will come around and learn to enjoy their new home.
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Tips
- Don't rush the decision.Thanks
- Be responsible about what is best for you and for the dog.Thanks
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References
- ↑ https://anticruelty.org/surrender
- ↑ https://www.humanesociety.org/resources/need-find-your-pet-new-home
- ↑ https://www.seattle.gov/animal-shelter/find-an-animal/adopt/surrender-your-pet
- ↑ https://animalcare.lacounty.gov/to-rehome-your-pet/
- ↑ https://www.anthempets.org/ownersurrender/
- ↑ https://www.sa.gov/Directory/Departments/ACS/Placement-Surrender/Surrender
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/coping-with-grief-and-loss.htm
About This Article
Dog Trainer
This article was co-authored by Cameron Thompsen. Cameron Thompsen is a Dog Trainer and Human Coach, as well as the Owner and Founder of Hope2K9 Foundation. With nearly two decades of experience, she specializes in working with dogs and their owners on behavior issues ranging from severe anxiety, reactivity, as well as aggression and fear-based problems. She works with all dogs at Hope2K9 so that they are fully trained before adoption, and provides lifelong support to dog owners after adoption. This article has been viewed 202,131 times.
Co-authors: 12
Updated: November 7, 2023
Views: 202,131
Categories: Dogs
Article SummaryX
It’s hard to give away a dog when you don’t want to, but it can help to find your dog a good home where you know it will be safe and happy. Once you find the right home, spend as much time as you can with your dog before giving it away. During these times, do your best to not be sad, since that may cause your dog to become anxious and upset. When it’s time to say farewell, take the time to hug your dog and say goodbye properly. Then, once your dog is gone, remind yourself that you’ve done the right thing since it will be going to a loving home. For more advice from our Veterinary co-author, like how to make sure your dog is going to good home, keep reading.
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Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 202,131 times.
Reader Success Stories
"My dad gave away my dog when I was nine; he did it for the right reasons. She would follow me to school and my mum was scared that she would get run over. My dad knew I wouldn't let him do it, so he gave her away while I was at school. It really hurt me; this helped me understand how she felt and how to deal with my grief, thanks."..." more
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