How to Find Peace During Times of Uncertainty

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1Accepting the Uncertainty

2Taking Care of Yourself

3Seeking Help

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The world is filled with chaos, and in the midst of this, you may find yourself feeling uncertain about what lies ahead. Being fearful about the future, or even the present, can cause extreme stress and anxiety, which can wreak havoc on your life. You can find balance and peace in the strife, however, when you accept the uncertainty by performing a life assessment. In addition, you can adopt strategies to take better care of your health and well-being and reach out to other for help during unpredictable times.

Steps

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Accepting the Uncertainty

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   Question what you believe is certain in your life now. If you take a good, hard look at your life, you will likely find that what you thought was certain, probably isn’t. Additionally, if you examine your life prior to the uncertainty you recently experienced, you may also find that it wasn’t as stable as you thought it was. Situations in life are often temporary, and in realizing this, you may give yourself perspective, knowing that life is never certain, and what you are feeling now will likely pass, as well.

   • Examples of what you may think is certain but actually isn’t is getting home from work every day without getting into an accident, the health of you and your family, your job security, and your relationship status. When you look at life this way, you realize that not many things are certain.
2. 
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   Know that one thing is certain in life: change. One thing you can know for certain is that change is unavoidable — the people, animals, nature, the planet, even the universe — are changing all the time. Learning to accept that change is inevitable and part of life may help you stay calm when uncertainty strikes. Getting comfortable with change may seem like an impossible challenge, especially if you are very afraid of it, but it can be done. When you implement a few exercises in your life, you will likely find that you become better able to face uncertainty.

   • Consider why change is frightening. Do you feel out of control when thing are uncertain? Is an unexpected change causing you to reconsider your identity or how you define yourself (for example, from the role of a student to a workforce employee)?
   • For example, trying something new on a daily basis can help you become accustom to change. For instance, moving a piece of furniture, trying a new shampoo or toothpaste, or taking a different route to work may help you feel better about change. Don’t go overboard with these new changes; start out small and then gradually work your way up to something more drastic.
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   Let go of the fear. Preparing for the worst might seem like a good way to live, but you can’t stop every bad thing from happening. Realizing that you need to live in the moment, and not turning to your bad experiences of the past, can help you embrace uncertainty and ultimately find peace.

   • Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can happen?” when facing uncertainty. When you take a calm and rational look at the worst-case scenario, you’ll likely find that what you are afraid of isn’t really that bad.
   • A therapist can also help you let go of fear by identifying and changing unrealistic thought patterns that hold you back from living your best life. In therapy, you can also do exposure exercises that require you to face your fears so that they lose their power over you.
   • Use things that happened in your past to inform your choices, but don't let them rule you. For instance, if you were in a bad relationship in the past, don't give up on dating altogether. Instead, use what you learned from that relationship to spot red flags and avoid toxic relationships in the future.
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Taking Care of Yourself

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   Practice mindfulness. How often do you find yourself on auto-pilot, or going through the motions without really paying attention to what is going on? It is in these moments that we often allow our anxieties to grow. Mindfulness is about being aware of what is going on around you, and taking it all in. In general, people who practice mindfulness are usually less anxious.

   • One way to practice mindfulness is to pay attention to your breathing. Focus on your breathing and what happens to your body as you do so. Feel your chest expand and fall and take note to any differences you feel as you breathe deeply. Another way to get into mindfulness is to choose an activity in which you often go on “auto-pilot,” and take the time to notice everything around you while doing it.
   • These simple exercises can help you to become more comfortable with mindfulness, which may make you feel better about your situation.
2. 
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   Meditate. Quieting the mind, especially when you are feeling stressed, worried, and nervous, is something that people often find extremely difficult. When you are able to, however, you often find that you feel calm and at peace with yourself. Meditation is a simple way to clear your head and help you find the peace you long for.

   • To start meditating, sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, and breathe slowly. Begin by taking five minutes out of your day to do this, then gradually increase the length. When your mind begins to drift, acknowledge what you were thinking, rather than trying to kick it out of your brain, then begin to focus on your breath again.
   • Deep breathing brings more oxygen to your brain and activates your parasympathetic nervous system. It can reverse some of the side effects of anxiety, lowering your blood pressure and slowing down your heart beat.
3. 
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   Eat right. You’ll likely find that when your body is feeling good, you’ll experience less anxiety and find peace. Therefore, you need to fuel your body with nutritious foods that support your well-being. Choose whole, real foods like fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean sources of protein, and dairy options that are low in fat.

   • Stay away from fast or convenience foods. It can be tempting when you're stressed, but these foods only make you feel worse. Say "no" to sugary desserts, caffeine, alcohol, salty snacks, and drive-thru meals to feel like your best self.
4. 
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   Exercise. When you don’t take care of your body, your mind often suffers. Combat this by exercising for at least 30 minutes every day. Doing so releases endorphins, which are nature's "feel-good" hormones that lift your mood and give you energy to face whatever comes your way.

   • Visit your local gym to get in some cardio or strength-training. Or, simply go outside to ride a bike, go on a hike, or walk your dog around the block.
5. 
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   Get enough sleep. Sleep and stress work in a chicken-or-the-egg dynamic — it's hard to tell which came first. If you get little sleep, you will experience greater anxiety. If you're feeling stressed out and anxious, your sleep will be negatively affected. Counteract this by creating a sleep routine that optimizes you getting quality rest.

   • Avoid naps too close to bedtime. Turn off TVs, phones, and computers at least an hour before bed since the blue-light from these devices keeps you awake. Make your bedroom off-limits to other activities besides sleep or sex. And, try to go to sleep and wake at the same times every day.
6. 6
   Reconnect with nature. A Stanford University study found that walking in nature for 90 minutes can have a positive effect on your mental health. Other studies have found that having access to nature can reduce stress, depression, and anxiety. Try going on a hike, going camping, rock climbing, swimming, or fishing in a lake. Practice mindfulness and allow yourself to be in the moment — take deep breaths and smell the air, notice the sounds and sights around you.

   • Opening up to the healing connection of nature could potentially provide further insight into your own personal experiences and how you are emotionally and cognitively affected.
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Seeking Help

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   Talk to friends or family. Uncertain times can make you feel isolated and alone; however, you can choose to seek out the comfort or support of others to help you through. Friends, family, or trusted co-workers can serve as a listening ear or shoulder to cry on when life seems crazy.

   • Ask for support when you need it. Say, "Mom, everything in my life seems to be going wrong. I could really use your problem-solving skills right now. Do you mind helping me out?"
2. 
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   Release your fears to your higher power. Ask God, Buddha, the universe, or whomever you believe in to take your anxious feelings away from you. Give your worries over to your higher power so that you are able to live in peace. Letting go of your need to be in control and putting trust in something else to take care of you may be just what you need to get through your time of uncertainty and feel that everything will work out.
3. 
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   Talk to a therapist. When you’re feeling lost, talking it out often helps. Seeking the help of a therapist allows you to understand the cause of your uncertainty, which may help you to stop the fear once and for all. The therapist may also suggest ways for you to cope when you’re feeling worried.

   • Be honest with your therapist. Tell your therapist that you are afraid of the uncertainty in your life and are fearful of what is to come. Holding back will hinder your recovery.
4. 
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   Join a support group. When you’re struggling, sometimes the best medicine is to be around those who are going through the same experience. Figure out what is bothering you the most — whether it is anxiety, depression, or something else — then find a group that can help. You may find that joining a religious group is beneficial, as you can talk to others about what you are enduring, and find help through your religion or beliefs.
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Expert Q&A

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• Question

  Can you fail at meditation?

  

  Colleen Campbell, PhD
  Career & Life Coach

  Dr. Colleen Campbell is the Founder and CEO of The Ignite Your Potential Centers, Career and Life Coaching based in the San Francisco Bay Area and Los Angeles. Colleen received her MA and PhD in Clinical Psychology from Sofia University and has been career coaching since 2008.

  

  Colleen Campbell, PhD

  Career & Life Coach

  Expert Answer

  No, keep trying if meditation doesn't become a habit right away. Sometimes you might be consistent about meditating, and other times you might fall off of that. It's almost part of the process, so keep in mind that it's OK and you'll find your way back. Meditating even 5 minutes a day can be very beneficial, so don't worry if you can't find 20 or 30 minutes every time.

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