How to Explain Bipolar Disorder to Others

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1Explaining the Basics of Bipolar Disorder

2Debunking Myths

3Asking for Support

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If you or someone you love has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, you may be wondering how you will explain it to others. Although it can be hard to speak out about mental illness, a lack of understanding and social support can make dealing with bipolar disorder much more challenging. You can start by explaining the basics of your mood changes and your official diagnosis. Work to dispel any misconceptions loved ones may have. Be specific about the support necessary to manage the disorder. Keep in mind who you are describing the condition to and the purpose of the explanation. Your approach may vary whether you are describing the condition to an employer, family member, friend, or teacher. Whether you want to spread awareness, find support, or qualify for accommodations at work or school may also affect how you form your explanation.

Steps

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Explaining the Basics of Bipolar Disorder

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   Introduce bipolar disorder by explaining intense moods. Intense mood swings characterize bipolar disorder. If someone has never heard of bipolar disorder, they may be confused as to how it affects someone. To start off explaining the basics, begin by letting them know that people with bipolar often experience intense moods.

   • Say something like, "Bipolar disorder results in intense shifts in moods. While everyone has their highs and lows, people with bipolar tend to experience these more intensely and have more extreme highs and lows than those without the disease."
   • You can then briefly explain mania and depression. For example, say, "People with bipolar disorder often experience low moods called depression as well as high moods called mania."
   • It may be helpful to send a guide to bipolar disorder to your family and friends so that they can read up on it as well. The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance is a useful place to begin.
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   Describe the depressive aspect of bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder is marked by periods of depression. Everyone's depression manifests in different ways, so be clear about how your depression specifically shows itself. You should also let people know how often you experience depression and how long the periods last. If you are explaining someone else's bipolar disorder, make sure you know their specific experiences with depression. For example, if a child has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, you may need to explain to teachers, friends, and family members.

   • For example, say something like, "My depressive spells usually last a couple of weeks. I tend to feel very tired and I'm not really interested in leaving my house much." If you're talking about someone else, you could say, "He is usually very slowed down during depressive spells and may not be as social."
   • Try to explain how depression differs from regular sadness. For example, "Everyone gets sad, but with clinical depression you can't snap out of it. It's hard to distract yourself from bad feelings."
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   Go over mania. Mania is marked by very high moods that go on for a number of days or weeks. Explain your experience with mania, how often manic spells occur, and what kinds of behaviors in you engage in. If you're explaining bipolar disorder to someone else, make sure you know that person's experiences with mania.

   • Say something like, "I don't feel manic as often as I feel depressed, but when my manic spells come they last about a week." When explaining for someone else, you can say something like, "She can be very talkative in her manic episodes, and sometimes a little hyperactive."
   • Explain the behaviors you engage in. For example, say something like, "I tend to need less sleep and have trouble concentrating. My thoughts get out of control and I'm unable to focus on one thing." If you're explaining for someone else, let someone know any specific behaviors to expect from that person. For example, "He tends to struggle to focus on schoolwork when he's manic and can be somewhat disruptive."
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   Explain your specific diagnosis. There are varying levels of bipolar disorder. When explaining bipolar disorder to a loved one, make sure they know your specific diagnosis. If you're explaining someone else's bipolar disorder, make sure you know that person's diagnosis.

   • Bipolar I Disorder is marked by more intense manic and depressive episodes that last for longer periods and may require hospitalization. When explaining Bipolar I Disorder, say something like, "My episodes can be very intense and I've been hospitalized in the past. Episodes tend to last between seven days and two weeks."
   • Bipolar II Disorder is marked by depressive episodes but less intense manic episodes called hypomania. Say something like, "She experiences hypomania at times, which is less intense than full-blown mania. While my child has extreme highs, she can usually still sleep and mostly manage day-to-day things."
5. 
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   Talk about how you manage symptoms. Tell family and friends that you are doing all that you can to manage your symptoms. Let them know your specific care plan or the specific care plan of someone else.

   • Explain any medications being used to treat bipolar disorder. For example, "I'm on a mood stabilizer that I have to take every day" or "My son has mood stabilizers he takes for the disorder."
   • If you're in therapy, let the person know. Say something like, "I attend therapy every week too to talk over my moods with a counselor."
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Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Debunking Myths

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   Make sure people know bipolar disorder is real. Unfortunately, there are still people who doubt mental illness and mental health diagnoses. Make sure you let people know bipolar disorder is a real illness. If someone questions a diagnosis or makes a comment questioning mental illness in general, speak up. Say something like, "Bipolar disorder has been around for a long time. While it was called different things throughout history, it's always been a valid diagnosis."

   • It can also help to let the person know you can't just "snap out of it." Say something like, "The difference between bipolar disorder and just being sad and being happy is that I can't really control my moods. I can't just cheer up or calm down when I need to."
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   Let people know people with bipolar disorder are capable. There is still a lot of stigma around bipolar disorder. Many people assume those with the disorder are unable to live normal lives. Let people know this is not the case. If someone, for example, feels you can't handle a task at work due to your disorder, let them know this is not the case. Say something like, "Even though I struggle with this disorder, I work hard to make sure I can still day to day activities. It doesn't mean I can't do things everyone else can."

   • You should also speak up if someone says another person cannot do something due to a bipolar diagnosis. For example, if someone mentions they're not sure a colleague with bipolar disorder is up to a task, say something like, "Actually, most people with bipolar disorder are capable when symptoms are managed."
   • If you are taking treatment that effectively manages symptoms, mention this. Say something like, "I have medication that really helps control my moods. Even though the disorder is difficult at times, it's not a hopeless situation."
   • It may be helpful to compare bipolar disorder to a medical ailment. For example, "It's like if someone has diabetes. While they have to be careful and manage their symptoms, with the right care they are able to engage in most activities without trouble."
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   Dispel misconceptions about medication. Many people have negative feelings about medication. They may think it changes a person fundamentally or makes someone numb or robotic. While it can take a while to find the right medication, medication is helpful when you're taking the right dosage.

   • Say something like, "People do have bad experiences with medication while finding the right treatment. I was on things that made me feel different or numb, but I worked with my doctor to find the right medication."
   • Explain how the medication helps you. Say something like, "Now that I'm on the right meds, I feel fine. My moods are more stable, but I'm still able to experience normal highs and lows and I don't feel like they affect my overall personality."
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   Explain why therapy is important. Many people think therapy is self-indulgent or unhelpful. Let people know many people benefit from therapy. Seeking help is not a sign of weakness.

   • It can help to compare bipolar disorder to a medical condition. For example, say something like, "If you had a chronic heart condition, you would need to see a doctor regularly. Because I have a chronic mental health condition, I do need to see a therapist."
   EXPERT TIP

   

   Liana Georgoulis, PsyD

   Licensed Psychologist

   Dr. Liana Georgoulis is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 10 years of experience, and is now the Clinical Director at Coast Psychological Services in Los Angeles, California. She received her Doctor of Psychology from Pepperdine University in 2009. Her practice provides cognitive behavioral therapy and other evidence-based therapies for adolescents, adults, and couples.

   

   Liana Georgoulis, PsyD
   Licensed Psychologist

   Therapy fills a need in our society for connection and information. Psychologist Dr. Liana Georgoulis says: "Many years ago, we had people in our communities we could go to, like clergymen or shaman. That's shifting now, so it's important to have someone you can speak with who knows about the human mind and how the brain and body work together. Therapy can really help normalize your struggles, and you can learn options that can help you get to a better place."

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Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Asking for Support

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   Ask that friends and family members educate themselves. You have already taken the first step by explaining to your friends and family the basics of bipolar disorder. Now, encourage friends and family to take the extra step and thoroughly research your disorder on their own time. Ask them to read more about the disorder to help them understand it better.

   • Encourage them to look at websites like the International Bipolar Foundation, which provide helpful information online.
   • Additionally, if you are comfortable with it, suggest that they come to appointments with you. Speaking directly to the doctor about any questions or concerns can help them broaden their understanding of bipolar disorder.
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   Ask for social support. People who are feeling depressed sometimes isolate themselves. Let people know what they can do if you're struggling with a depressive episode at any point. Say something like, "Sometimes when I'm depressed I need extra social support. I would appreciate it if you could be there for me when I'm feeling down."

   • People are often unsure what to do when someone is depressed. Let people know what you need specifically. For example, say something like, "I don't need to be coddled or talk about how I'm feeling a lot. Just having someone around to distract me is helpful. We could just watch a movie together."
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   Discuss your symptoms with family and friends. You want people to understand the warning signs that you're experiencing mania and depression. This can help them identify when you may need extra support. Begin with something like, "There are some signs I'm experiencing mania or depression that I think you should know about."

   • To explain depression, say something like, "If I seem really quiet and disinterested in social events, I may be experiencing depression."
   • To explain mania, say something like, "If I seem really energetic and unusually talkative, I may be going into a manic episode."
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   Talk about the importance of stress reduction. Stress can worsen bipolar disorder, so let people know when you need a low-stress environment. For example, say something like, "When I'm depressed, I can't handle a lot of stress. Don't feel like I'm being rude if I cancel plans more frequently. Even small things, like going to see a movie, can cause me a lot of stress."
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   Request they support any restrictions on your lifestyle. Many people with bipolar disorder have certain restrictions. You may have to stay away from alcohol or certain foods, for example, due to medication. Let people know how they can support your lifestyle restrictions.

   • For example, say something like, "Alcohol tends to make my depression worse, so I don't drink. I would appreciate it if you didn't invite me out to bars, because I tend to feel left out when other people are drinking."
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