How to Deal with Emotional Stress (for Teens)

For many, adolescence is a time of great stress. In addition to physical changes and complicated social dynamics, you are probably experiencing significant academic pressure and anxiety about major life decisions. While you will never eliminate all of your stress, you can manage it using effective coping strategies. Try different strategies to find out which ones work best for you.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Expressing your Emotions

1
Recognize signs of stress. People tend to associate stress with negative events, but happy occasions can also increase stress. This sometimes makes it difficult to identify when we are experiencing a higher level of stress.
- Physiological signs are often easier to identify, so listen to your body. Common physical responses to stress include: digestive problems (nausea, diarrhea, constipation, or indigestion), sleeping problems (insomnia or sleeping too much), an increase or decrease of appetite, shortness of breath and rapid heart rate and/or headaches.^{[1]XResearch source}
For some, the natural response to feeling overwhelmed is to reduce social interactions, but keeping your stress bottled up will only exacerbate the problem. Emotional support will decrease your stress by eliminating confounding feelings of being alone in your struggles. Seek out friends and family to confide in. If you don't feel comfortable talking to someone you know, you can join social support groups or use a general support hotline.^{[2]XResearch source}
3
Find a creative outlet. In addition to distracting you from your worries, creating something also provides a sense of accomplishment. Find the creative medium that feels most cathartic for you.
- Write about it. Poetry and creative writing are great ways for you to experience an emotional release and feel productive. Keeping a journal can help organize your thoughts and help prepare you to talk to others about your problems.^{[3]XTrustworthy SourceHarvard Medical SchoolHarvard Medical School's Educational Site for the PublicGo to source}
- Draw or paint it. Drawing and painting are some of the easiest and most convenient ways to reduce stress, as is crafting and sculpting. This is particularly beneficial to teens.^{[4]XTrustworthy SourcePubMed CentralJournal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of HealthGo to source}
- Sing about it. If you aren't musically gifted, don't worry. You do not need to produce original pieces, and nobody else needs to hear it. Singing along to your favorite songs, especially those you feel represent your current emotional experience, will distract you from your worries and help you release emotion.^{[5]XResearch source}
4
Get active and find a physical activity that you enjoy. Physical activity has been shown to relieve stress, and regular exercise may improve your ability to cope over time.^{[6]XResearch source}
- Getting involved in group sports is a great way to commit to regular exercise and also increase opportunities to interact with others.
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Changing Distorted Thoughts

1
Recognize distorted thoughts. We create much of our own stress. We start to have negative thoughts when we are faced with potentially stressful events.^{[7]XResearch source} When we substitute our negative thoughts with more positive ones, we can change the way we feel. You can expose distorted thinking by asking yourself a few questions:
- Am I assuming the worst? There are usually multiple possible outcomes to a situation, but we tend to focus on the worst, even if it isn't the most likely.
- Am I creating unnecessary limitations? We often create ideal scenarios, with guidelines or rules about how to achieve that success. When circumstances change, we often apply those rules to new possible solutions, without realizing we set them arbitrarily to begin with. We will then dismiss possible solutions that don't fit the originally established guidelines.
- Am I ignoring potential resources? It's easy to get caught up in our negative thinking patterns and start to feel the situation is hopeless. When we feel hopeless, we tend to give up. Commit to looking for additional resources, and you may be surprised by what you can find.
2
Focus on the positives. Once you've recognized your negative thinking patterns, start to change them by focusing on the positives. Look for silver linings, even in the most difficult situations. Humor is a good way to turn the negative into something more positive.^{[8]XResearch source}
- If you struggle to find any benefit at all, focus on the fact that nothing lasts forever. It will soon be the past and your struggles will be nothing but a memory.
- For example, social rejection can be devastating, but the social circumstances of high school usually don't extend beyond graduation. Social groups generally break up in adulthood.
3
Look for opportunities. Even if you have failed, don't allow yourself to feel defeated. When one door closes, another door opens.^{[9]XResearch source}
- Think about how you can take what you've learned and become something better. If the stressful situation doesn't resolve in your favor, you will find what other things you are then free to pursue.
- For example, if you are not accepted to the college you've spent your entire high school career preparing for, you are then free to apply to and explore other colleges, other majors and other career paths. By being open to possibilities, you may find something far more rewarding than what you intended.
4
Identify your strengths. We focus on our perceived weaknesses, but we can choose to focus on our strengths and abilities.^{[10]XResearch source}
- Try thinking about how a weakness might actually be beneficial in some instances. Maybe this weakness can somehow be turned into a strength.
- For example, if you are shy, you might be a really good listener and considerate of others' thoughts and feelings. Shyness may be perceived negatively, but thoughtfulness is positive.
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Asking for Help

1
Recognize when you need help. It can be difficult to admit when we need it. Some people feel asking for help is a sign of weakness, when it actually takes exceptional insight and courage. Identify what stressors you can get through with only a little help from friends and which might require greater intervention.
- Signs requiring intervention include: extreme mood swings, self harm or thoughts of self harming, suicidal thoughts, feeling hopeless, uncontrollable crying, outbursts of anger or a desire to harm others.^{[11]XResearch source}
2
Identify potential resources. You may feel like you're alone, but there are lots of people who care and want to help you. Find someone you feel comfortable talking to and other people who can help you further.
- Parents are usually who you can confide in but if you feel you can't talk to them, there are always other people. Your school counselor can help you talk to your parents. Helplines are a good way to connect with someone if you don't feel you can talk about your problems face to face.
3
Ask for intervention. After identifying the people you'd like to help you, communicate your specific needs. Sometimes just telling someone about your problem is enough, sometimes it isn't. If it isn't, even people close to you may not realize the severity of the situation. By telling others what you need, you'll eliminate the guess work they'd need to give you the best possible help.
- If you don't know exactly how they can help, maybe tell them you'd like to start seeing a therapist or mental health counselor. Mental health professionals are trained to help you figure what you need and how to get it.
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Tips

A healthy lifestyle contributes to effective coping strategies.
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Warnings

If you feel like you may harm yourself or others, seek professional help immediately.
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Avoid use of drugs and alcohol, as this may be dangerous and exacerbate the problem.
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