How to Deal with Being a Gifted Kid

Many people wish that they were smarter; you can complete assignments in a jiffy, and you won't have to study for tests. However, being gifted (or above average in intelligence) is a double-edged sword to many people. ^{[1]XResearch source} The joys of being able to learn faster than other people also comes with some disadvantages such as having to deal with higher standards, having fewer friends, and increased pressure and anxiety. This How.com.vn offers tips on how to deal with being gifted in your daily life.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Doing Work

1
Aim to finish any work you have to do. A struggle that many people have is finishing their daily tasks. Many people have trouble getting started, and they procrastinate by doing other work or doing nothing. When the due date comes (or if the problem has turned into a large issue), you may feel nervous about finishing your late assignments as well as assignments from today. Write a to-do list, and motivate yourself with something you like. Lock away any video games, drawing kits, or devices, and take them out only when you have finished your work.
- Many gifted kids find their work to be too boring because they already understand the material. Find extra material on what you are learning online, or ask the teacher for extra worksheets. ^{[2]XResearch source}
2
Pay attention in class. Just because you absorb information faster than regular people doesn't mean you should slack off in class or cram information days before a test. Cramming usually backfires, and your brain will lose the information you crammed in even faster due to the immense pressure it has faced. ^{[3]XResearch source} Actively engage yourself in class by taking notes and talking in group discussions. Take good notes by summarizing certain concepts and writing down definitions of vocabulary.
- If taking notes is boring for you, try making it interesting by drawing diagrams and using different colors of stationery (e.g. highlighters, colored pencils, pens) to decorate your notes.
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3
Give yourself challenges. Work can get boring if you don't have challenges to keep your brain thinking. If a concept is too easy for you, try teaching it to people who are unfamiliar with the concept to see if you really get it. In school, ask the teachers for extra practice worksheets or even a preview of the material for the next class to continue learning.
4
Find hobbies you enjoy. Don't attend a chess class or a math Olympiad just because other competitive classmates are doing so (or if your parents want you to). Be open-minded and try a variety of different things until you can settle for which hobby you like the best. At school, join a variety of different clubs. You can cancel clubs that you don't want to attend anymore and join only the ones you like later. Hobbies can make your free time useful and enjoyable, and they can decrease your stress levels. They are a great way to relax after a long day of school.
5
Embrace your creativity. Many gifted kids have a unique set of skills they have along with their giftedness. A gifted child may excel at finding patterns, and another kid may be able to draw complex drawings from memory. Some can memorize a lot of information at once, whereas some are empaths. Many people with ADHD and autism are also gifted. ^{[4]XResearch source} Use your gifted talents to the best of your ability, and embrace it. Don't just use it to impress other people; use it to do what you want to do.
- For example, use your art skills to attend an art competition.
- Make funny skits with sarcasm and humor to make your friends laugh during lunch.
- Help your grandparents run their store and calculate things like change and how much money they earn.
- Enter a creative writing contest.
6
Have some long-term motivation. Motivation can be difficult to have when you are above average. If your motivator is grades or your ego, you may find it difficult to continue studying to the best of your ability because you are excelling in it so much. On the other hand, many gifted kids give up on academics in school because they have failed to maintain good grades. This makes them lose motivation in school, and they may become withdrawn from other parts of their life.
- Use short-term motivation methods sometimes- if you finish 30 minutes of homework, you get a snack. Or, you can take a nice bath if you finish your work early.
- Also think about the big picture- if you consistently achieve your goals, you will complete the course, which may help you in finding college courses to take or a future career path. Even if it doesn't sound like something useful, it will help you in some way when you are older.
7
Find ways to study. Gifted kids don't usually study for a long time because they remember more information from the last lecture. As children, gifted kids may study for little to no time, causing them to lack the study habits and work ethic they need for high school, college, and a job. Without these skills, you will very likely go down a slippery slope of worsening grades, which will cause a lack of motivation. Some people get anxiety or depression because of their circumstances.
- Now is the time to start learning how to take effective notes, pay attention in class, and review before a test.
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Part 2

Part 2 of 2:

Dealing With Stress

Unfortunately, gifted people are often faced with higher standards. This causes them to believe that they have to constantly excel at whatever they do, even when they are struggling with it. These standards may be placed on them by parents, their environment, or themselves. Because of this, there are often higher rates of perfectionism, anxiety, burnout, and depression associated with being gifted. ^{[5]XResearch source}

1
Ask for help. As a gifted child, you probably didn't ask for help that much, because you usually didn't struggle with any concepts. However, as you grew older, asking for help became more difficult because your standards were so high, and people expected you to know the material already. Some people may have refused to help you because you were "smart". This caused you to not develop the crucial skill of asking for help. Remember, everyone asks for help at times. No one knows the answers to everything, and even "smart" people struggle sometimes. It may seem shameful to ask for help because your "smart" status will be disproven, but that is not true.
- To start, write an email to your teacher asking for specific help on a problem or a subject. You can then meet your teacher privately during their office hours (after-school times when students can ask for help) or have a private meeting with them.
2
Set realistic standards. Many gifted students have faced immense pressures in dealing with their parents' standards. For example, gifted kids may have parents who sign them up for various activities after school every day, leaving them with little to no downtime to do their hobbies. Some parents make their child skip a grade (or even multiple), leaving them with little to no ways of relating to their peers. Gifted people who grew up like this may feel isolated from their peers and burnt out. They grow up to be perfectionists and may have low self-esteem. ^{[6]XResearch source} So, put your standards lower than usual. You don't need to get As on every test to succeed.
- It is normal to "fail" at something the first time you do it; you learn from your mistakes. It is normal to do something multiple times and get it wrong; you just need more practice. Lastly, getting something wrong does not determine your value as a person.
- If you get something wrong on a test, find out why you got it wrong. Was it a silly mistake? Did you misread the question? Did you not put in enough effort? Did you not understand the material? Go over your commonly missed questions on tests and piece together what the main issue is.
- Celebrate small accomplishments; don't just think all or nothing. If you got a math test grade of a B instead of a B-, congratulate yourself. If you avoid falling over a hurdle in PE, pat yourself on the back.
3
Ignore people who brag. Braggarts frequently brag about every single one of their achievements, which can bring people down. This may lower your self-esteem. Remember that they have their own standards and that you don't need to compare yourself to them. If they are bragging about how they got their fifth A+ on a test, just remember that your overall course average has increased from a B+ to an A-. Think about your own goals, and don't be influenced by other people to raise them to an unachievable level.
- If you have reached multiple goals, you shouldn't brag about them either. There is a fine line between having confidence and being overly confident.
4
Embrace your giftedness, but do it to an extent. Don't constantly shove the fact that you are gifted into people's faces. Your parents may have told you to do this as a kid to impress classmates and teachers. However, this just perpetuates the high standards people around you put, which increases the stress and unhappiness inside. Use your giftedness in ways that you think are beneficial to yourself; don't put on a show for everyone to see. Don't fake anything. You'll develop people-pleasing habits, which will prevent you from getting what you want in life.
5
Talk with your parents about the struggles you are facing. Your parents may not realize that they have put such tight standards on you. They may have grown up this way too, and not realize it. They may be perfectionists themselves and don't see this as a problem. So, when you don't meet their standards, they may be very disappointed. They may say that you have not reached your full potential. ^{[7]XResearch source} This leads you to have academic anxiety and low self-esteem, leading to little motivation in school. Find a good time to talk, preferably when your parents are off work, and chat with them about your academic life and how their standards are affecting you.
- Use "I" language when speaking. You don't want to excessively blame them and say "It's your fault!" Remember to have empathy for your parents; they want you to succeed in life with your talents- it's just that their standards are too high.
6
Think about what matters the most to you in life. Having motivation is a large part of being successful in your school and work life. Without motivation, you won't have a reason to continue doing your work, which causes low performance. Gifted people usually think outside of the box, and they may question why people do a certain thing or have existential thoughts. You may feel like doing work is very boring, and there is no reason to continue because it is useless. This is not entirely true; your schoolwork helps you gain knowledge of topics you'll need to know in high school and college. Your job is most likely benefiting to yourself and other people. Follow your values to feel interested in what you're doing now, and to feel much happier.
- If you believe that family is the most important, think that your work will help your family.
- If you educate yourself in school, you will probably get into a decent college. By keeping up with college work, you will find a suitable job easier, which will likely give you the income needed to sustain yourself. If you are feeling unsatisfied with your job, you can always switch to a new one.
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