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This article was co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Wisconsin specializing in Addictions and Mental Health. She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 19 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 39,458 times.
Life presents us with many tough situations to overcome.[1] Handling the emotions that come with difficult situations, like fear, anger, grief, and sadness, can be overwhelming.[2] Luckily, there are solutions that can help you cope with everything you're going through. In this article, we'll show you how self-care, friendship, asking for help, therapy, spirituality, meditation, and journaling can get you through tough times.[3]
Steps
Method 1
Method 1 of 4:
Finding Low-Stress Solutions
Figure out what you can do about your situation. Give yourself a few minutes to reflect on your situation and figure out a plan of action. Ask yourself, is this a situation I can fix? Is this a life situation that calls for patience? Or is this a situation that I need to walk away from? Once you have clarity about what you can do about it, you will feel better about moving forward.[4]
List possible solutions to your problems. Give yourself 5 minutes to imagine as many possible solutions as you can come up with. Review the list and consider which options are best.- Avoid searching in vain for the perfect solution to your problem. Instead, go for solutions that will work well given the circumstances.[5]
Make a plan to deal with your hard life. Using the approaches you have come up with, make a plan for concrete and low-stress solutions to your difficult situation.[6] Be clear and specific about your intentions and plans for change.[7]- Try starting with a plan to change small things in your life.[8] For instance, if you want to get in good physical condition, start with a plan to fit exercise into your calendar for the week.
- Try the act, learn, build, repeat model. Life is full unexpected circumstances. Yet, we can still make plans to achieve our aspirations, take action on those plans, and learn from our experiences.[9]
Move on! You will have to move on with your life. Don’t let difficult life situations hold you back forever. Try to let go of the emotional baggage and move forward with your relationships and career.[10]Advertisement
Method 2
Method 2 of 4:
Taking Good Care of Yourself
Rest. Getting through a difficult life situation can feel like an endurance event. Take fifteen-minute naps during the day.[11] There are numerous benefits of rest such as improved memory and lower stress.
Exercise. Go to your local gym, take a swim, or a walk around the block. Just fifteen minutes a day can help you cope with your difficult life situation.[14] In addition, exercise helps to improve your mood, lower stress, and strengthen your immune system.[15]- For instance, try a fifteen minute skipping rope routine.[16]
Let yourself laugh. Give yourself permission to laugh at times, even if things seem dire.[20] It is not known whether laughter itself helps people feel better. It may be things that go along with it like friends and a positive attitude. Yet, it can't hurt! It seems to produce similar benefits to exercise.[21]
Give yourself 15 minutes to spend time with your feelings. If you are having a hard time dealing with grief, set aside a few minutes at the end of the day when you know you can just be sad.[22]- If you are dealing with grief, try a combination of Talking, Exercising, Artistic expression, Recording or writing experiences and Sobbing (i.e., TEARS). The combination of these approaches can help you deal with grief.[23]
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Method 3
Method 3 of 4:
Finding Help During Hard Times
Ask for help and be open to receiving it. Friends, family, co-workers, support groups, spiritual groups, or even higher powers may help. You need to be open to receiving help in whatever form it takes.[24]- 2Surround yourself with people who can help you to see past your trauma. People who will support and encourage you are who you should spend the majority of your time around. This can include friends, family members, your therapist, or anyone else who helps you to see past your trauma.
Talk to friends. Social bonds increase our well-being. Friends may offer insights that you would never think of. They can offer moral support, an attentive ear and friendly advice.[25]- Make new friends. Of course, making new friends as an adult can be difficult. Try reconnecting to your core passions, and see what friendships emerge.[26]
Find a good therapist. You might want to find a therapist such as a psychologist to talk about your difficult life event.[27] Ask your physician, family, friends, or your community mental health centre for therapy recommendations. There are many kinds of therapists such as social workers, psychologists, and psychiatrists. Choose one you can trust, who is patient and non-judgmental.[28] A good therapist can help you get back on your feet.[29]- A good therapist can also help you move beyond traumas and address any mental health issues that result from them, such as post traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, or depression. Working with a therapist can also help you to process your current perceptions and determine whether or not they are based in reality. As part of your therapy, you can also build a coping skills plan and a self-care plan, discuss possibilities for treatment, and create some achievable goals and plans to help you attain those goals.
- Try calling the psychology department at the local university and asking for a recommendation.[30]
- If you are moving to a new city, ask your existing therapist if they know anybody there.[31]
Avoid spending time with people who make you feel worse. If there are toxic people in your life, you need to avoid spending time with them.[32]Advertisement
Method 4
Method 4 of 4:
Reaching Inward for Perspective
Avoid confusing yourself with your trauma. Remember that you are not the difficult situation in your life. You are not your job loss or your divorce.[33] Avoid negative self talk such as blaming yourself for everything that is wrong in your life.[34]- Be kind to yourself. For instance, don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to somebody else.[35]
Practice gratitude. Be grateful for all the little things like a friend calling you or the sun shining. There is always something to be grateful for.[36]- Start with something simple. If the sun comes out, be grateful for nice weather. If you are free of illness, be grateful for your health. If your heart is still ticking, be grateful for being alive.
- 4Consider the strengths you have developed as a result of a hard life. Whether you realize it or not, having had a hard life has likely helped you to develop strengths that you would not have otherwise developed. A therapist can help you to recognize these strengths as you work through the post traumatic process.[39]
Write about the difficult situation in your journal. Don’t worry about grammar or spelling. Just express your feelings about the situation in your own words.[40]- Give yourself some quiet time before journaling. For instance, you might want to light a candle and relax for a minute.
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Tips
- Remember to do the necessary things you have to do to relieve your stress.Thanks
- Find something you enjoy doing like music, sports etc.Thanks
- Get a positive attitude!Thanks
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Warnings
- Don't take your anger out on a living thing!Thanks
- Depression may arise from a very stressful or hard life, especially if the underlying problem is long-term. If you feel you may be sinking into depression, find someone to talk to before it gets worse. Avoid self-harm at all costs.Thanks
- Make sure your friends are ones you can trust.Thanks
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References
- ↑ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sura-flow/dealing-with-difficult-emotions_b_3722596.html
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Advice-Handling-Hard-Times
- ↑ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times
- ↑ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times
- ↑ http://www.chopra.com/ccl/transition-plan-10-steps-to-creating-a-major-life-change
- ↑ http://www.chopra.com/ccl/transition-plan-10-steps-to-creating-a-major-life-change
- ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/actiontrumpseverything/2013/01/13/how-to-plan-your-life-when-you-cant-plan-your-life/#14b9cd2fc1da
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/debbie-gisonni/coping-strategies_b_2813782.html
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/relaxation-technique/art-20045368?pg=2
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/relaxation-technique/art-20045368?pg=2
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://teens.webmd.com/benefits-of-exercise
- ↑ http://www.realsimple.com/health/fitness-exercise/15-minute-jump-rope-workout
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/meditation/art-20045858
- ↑ http://www.vipassanadhura.com/howto.htm
- ↑ http://www.vipassanadhura.com/howto.htm
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/debbie-gisonni/coping-strategies_b_2813782.html
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/give-your-body-boost-with-laughter
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/choose-therapist.aspx
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/debbie-gisonni/coping-strategies_b_2813782.html
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/margaret-manning/make-friends-as-an-adult_b_7529424.html
- ↑ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/how-to-find-therapist
- ↑ http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/choose-therapist.aspx
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/how-to-find-therapist?page=3
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/how-to-find-therapist?page=3
- ↑ http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/choose-therapist.aspx
- ↑ http://psychcentral.com/lib/therapists-spill-14-ways-to-get-through-tough-times/
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950?pg=2
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950?pg=2
- ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/debbie-gisonni/coping-strategies_b_2813782.html
- ↑ http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Advice-Handling-Hard-Times
- ↑ http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Deepak-Chopra-Advice-Handling-Hard-Times
- ↑ https://ct.counseling.org/2016/04/salutogenesis-using-clients-strengths-in-the-treatment-of-trauma/
- ↑ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/deal-better-hard-times
About this article
Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS
Professional Counselor
This article was co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Wisconsin specializing in Addictions and Mental Health. She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011. This article has been viewed 39,458 times.
Co-authors: 24
Updated: November 19, 2021
Views: 39,458
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 39,458 times.
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