How to Convince Your Parents to Give You a Later Curfew

Most parents enforce a curfew to ensure the health and safety of their children. Although later curfews become necessary as teens get older and more responsible, sometimes parents don’t know when to increase these freedoms. If you want your parents to extend your curfew, you will need to earn this privilege by demonstrating your maturity and negotiating your curfew in a respectful manner.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Demonstrating Your Maturity

Prove that you can handle a later curfew by obeying the curfew times that are already intact. Your parents are unlikely to extend your freedoms until you prove capable of respecting their current boundaries.^{[1]XResearch source}
Be responsible. Follow through on all of your commitments, regardless of whether they are at home, school, or extracurricular setting. If you make a mistake, own up to it, and hold yourself accountable for doing better in the future. A later curfew will only be rewarded when your parents believe you are reliable and responsible enough to handle it. If you demonstrate the capability to follow the rules consistently in all other contexts, your parents will have a difficult time denying your request for a later curfew.
Doing well in school is a great way to illustrate your maturity. Finish your homework by a reasonable hour, study for tests and quizzes, and complete all assignments on time.
Be sure to follow through on all of your household responsibilities to prove your ability to be responsible. Try not to whine or complain, as these behaviors are often read as immature. If you can, offer to run errands or do additional favors for your parents as well.
Prove your ability to be honest about where you spend time outside the house. If you go to the movies instead of studying for your math test, don't lie about it. A short term punishment for shirking your schoolwork will be less detrimental than losing your parents' trust if they catch you in a lie. Establishing your trustworthiness will pay off when you ask your parents to extend curfew. ^{[2]XResearch source}
Earning money and keeping a work schedule with minimal parental guidance is a great way to prove your independence. Take the initiative to drop by local restaurants, retail stores, and movie theaters, and ask if you can fill out an application for a part-time job. If you are too young for a job, look into volunteer positions at animal shelters, soup kitchens, or other nonprofit organizations. Your parents will be more likely to extend your curfew when you behave like an adult.^{[3]XResearch source}
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Part 2

Part 2 of 2:

Negotiating Your Curfew

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Form a strong argument. Think of several reasons why you deserve a later curfew. It might help to write down certain points to make sure you don’t forget any major points during your discussion. You should be prepared to have a mature conversation without getting frustrated or defensive.
- Brainstorm a few instances when you have demonstrated your maturity in the recent past. Remind your parents of your consistency with current curfew rules, or draw their attention to all the times you mowed the lawn without even being asked!
- Consider how a later curfew will affect your ability to balance school-work, part-time jobs, and your social life.
- Don’t make arguments based on your friend’s curfew. Your parents are unlikely to budge based on peer-pressure. You are more likely to convince them by communicating why your individual needs warrant a later curfew.^{[4]XResearch source}
Bring up the topic of extending curfew when your parents are available to have the conversation. If your parents are busy, make plans to have the discussion at a later date that you both agree upon. Making plans to talk with your parents will further demonstrate your maturity. Never attempt to negotiate your curfew on the spot.
Balance your desire for greater freedom with your parents’ concerns for your health and safety. If you need to be up early for work or school, argue for a curfew that will still allow you to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep. Do some research on statewide curfew laws for minors, and be sure that your proposition for extended curfew does not interfere with the law.^{[5]XResearch source}
When you ask for a later curfew, avoid whining and complaining; remain calm and collected, and draw from the arguments that you brainstormed earlier. If your parents express concern or reservation, tailor your replies to let them know you're listening. "I hear what you're saying, but have you considered..." or "That's a reasonable concern. However..." are great starts to a respectful response. Never use force when negotiating with your parents.^{[6]XResearch source}
Your parents will ultimately have the final say in the matter, and a compromised curfew is better than no change at all. Reasonable compromises might include earlier curfews on school nights, or extended curfews on special occasions, such as proms or other school dances.^{[7]XResearch source}
If you are unable to convince your parents through polite yet persistent argumentation, it’s best to accept their response as a temporary no. Try to take the news as best you can, and continue to prove your responsibility in other contexts. Ask them again when some time has passed.^{[8]XResearch source}
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Tips

Bring up the subject of extending curfew when your parents are already in a good mood.
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Don’t raise your voice or speak as though you’re entitled to a later curfew. Ultimately, your parents have the power to accept or reject your request, and you should respect their authority.
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If your parents seem resistant to your arguments, you should take the initiative to suggest your own compromises before they reject your request to extend curfew altogether.
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