How to Choose a Guardian for Your Child

As a parent, you can designate a guardian for your child in your will. The guardian is legally allowed to become substitute parents for your child in the event of your death or if you are unable to take care of your child.^{[1]XResearch source} Choosing a guardian can be a big decision and should not be taken lightly. When choosing a guardian, look for candidates based on their character as well as their financial stability, their health, and their lifestyle. You can also speak to your child and trusted family members to help identify the right person for this important role.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Selecting a Guardian Based on Character

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Look for a guardian who shares your family values. When looking for a guardian for your child, think about a person who shares your values and philosophies on family. Consider the person’s moral values, educational values, and social values. Ask yourself, does this person align with my own values in these areas? You may want to ensure your child is taken care of by someone who matches what you believe in and what you want to instill in your child.
- You may also consider the person’s religious beliefs and values around parenting. Perhaps you’d prefer a guardian who shares your religious beliefs or the beliefs your child has been raised in. Or maybe you’d like the guardian to share your ideas around parenting and child-rearing.
- For example, if you promote freedom of expression and freedom of belief to your child, you may look for a guardian who will do the same. If you are strict about curfew and doing chores with your child, you may want a guardian who will also be strict about these things.
2
Go for a guardian with a clean record. Another element of character you should consider is whether or not the guardian has a clean record. You may want a guardian who does not have a criminal record or a history of breaking the law. The guardian may also have good standing in their community and be considered an asset to society.
- Make sure you consider the issue of a clean record from your own personal perspective and preference. Maybe you have a person in mind who has had a run in with the law in the past. You may not disqualify them right away based on this issue if they have other good qualities.
3
Choose a guardian with a loving personality. You should also consider the guardian’s personality and whether they would be loving and caring towards your child. Ask yourself, is this person loving? Would they be a good role model for my child? Do they have the temperament to take care of my child?
- You should also choose someone who appears comfortable around children. Make sure the person is able to be physically affectionate towards your child and show them love in words and actions.
4
Consider trustworthy friends or family as guardians. As you search for a guardian for your child, you should consider close friends, close family, and far flung friends or family. Keep your search broad and do not limit yourself to just close family or friends. Consider if a relative that lives further away might be a good candidate. Though moving your child to a different area might be disruptive at first, the relative may be a good fit in other ways and worth considering.^{[2]XResearch source}
- Keep in mind children are resilient and will likely adapt to a new environment if necessary. Do not limit your search for a guardian to just people who live close to you or those who live in your area. Broadening the scope of your search could help you find the ideal guardian, even if they live in another state or area.
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Choosing a Guardian Based on Financial Stability, Health, and Lifestyle

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Look for a guardian who is financially stable. As you search for a guardian for your child, consider potential candidates who are financially stable and responsible. You may avoid choosing a guardian who has a high amount of debt, who does not have a steady job, or who does not handle their money well. Ask yourself, will this person be able to support my child financially? Will this person be a good role model in terms of money management for my child?^{[3]XResearch source}
- Remember that caring for a child requires a fair amount of money and a steady income. You do not want to burden someone with caring for your child if they are not financially stable. You also do not want to put your child at risk by placing them with someone who cannot provide for them financially.
2
Go for a guardian who is healthy and mature in age. Factor in the health of the guardian and confirm that they are in good health. The guardian should be physically and mentally well enough to care for your child and provide for them. You do not want the guardian’s health to put your child in danger or result in your child having to care for their guardian.
- You should also consider age of the guardian and make sure they are mature enough to care for a child. Having a guardian that is middle aged will ensure they have life experience and are able to conduct themselves as adults. A guardian that is very young may not be as responsible or as prepared to care for a child.
3
Choose a guardian who has the time and energy to care for a child. Consider the guardian’s lifestyle and whether they will have the time and energy necessary to take care of your child. Ask yourself, is the guardian able to fit a child into their existing lifestyle? Does the guardian have the time and energy to devote themselves to raising my child?
- For example, you may have a close relative who is a workaholic and unable to find enough time to sustain a romantic relationship, let alone care for a child. As a result, they may not make the best guardian for your child.
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Speaking to Others About the Decision

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Ask your child for their opinion. If your child is old enough to express an opinion, ask them who they would like as their guardian. Giving your child input on the decision may help you narrow down the list of candidates and make them feel like they are part of the process. They may also be able to identify a candidate that is suitable to be their guardian and be a good match for them.^{[4]XResearch source}
- For example, you may ask your child, “Who do you think would make a good guardian for you?” or “Who would you prefer to have as your guardian if something happened to me?”
2
Talk to trusted relatives and friends. Reach out to those you trust for guidance on choosing a guardian. You may speak to your parents, for example, and ask them how they choose a guardian for you. Or you may talk to a close friend and ask them for their opinion. Getting some perspective from those you trust could help you decide who the ideal guardian might be.^{[5]XResearch source}
- You may make a shortlist of three to four potential guardians and ask friends or family for their opinion. They may be able to help you narrow down your choice to one person.
- Keep in mind that though it may be helpful to get advice and guidance from others, ultimately, this is your decision. Try to go with your instincts and make an informed decision for yourself on who the guardian for your child should be.
3
Speak to potential guardians. It may also help to speak to people you are considering for the role of guardian for your child. Make sure the potential guardians are willing to take on such a big responsibility and feel they will be able to be good role models for your child.^{[6]XResearch source}
- For example, you may say to potential guardians, “Would you be willing to be a guardian for my child in the event something happens to me?” or “Would you be comfortable being a guardian for my child?”
- One or two of your potential guardians may not be comfortable with the responsibility, effectively taking them off the shortlist. This is within their right. Checking with potential candidates before you make a decision will ensure you chose someone who is willing and able to be a good guardian for your child.
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