This article was co-authored by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW and by How.com.vn staff writer, Annabelle Reyes. Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli specializes in individual and couples therapy focusing on relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more. She is the author of “Love Hacks: Simple Solutions to Your Most Common Relationship Issues” which details the top 15 relationship issues and 3 quick solutions to each. She is also the award-winning and best-selling author of “Thriving with ADHD”. Kelli co-hosted an advice show on LA Talk Radio and was a relationship expert for The Examiner. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
There are 19 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources.
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From the constant depictions of love in movies to the plethora of posts from happy couples on social media, it’s easy to fall into the misconception that the only way to be happy is to be in a relationship. Luckily for all the singles out there, this couldn't be further from the truth. It's completely possible to be happy, fulfilled, and thriving while being single, and there are even tons of benefits to it. If you’re wondering how to be single and happy, you’ve come to the right place. We’ve interviewed licensed psychotherapist Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW, on how to live your best single life and compiled a list of helpful advice, so keep reading!
Things You Should Know
- In order to thrive while being single, take the time to get to know yourself better and pursue your unique hobbies and interests.
- Relying on your support system, focusing on self-care, and avoiding couple-themed media can also help you feel happy and fulfilled as a single person.
- Being single has several benefits, including better sleep, lower risk of certain health issues, and freedom to spend your time however you want.
Steps
Expert Q&A
- QuestionCan you be single and happy?Allison Broennimann, PhDDr. Allison Broennimann is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with a private practice based in the San Francisco Bay Area providing psychotherapy and neuropsychology services. With over a decade of experience, Dr. Broennimann specializes in in-depth psychotherapy to provide solution-focused treatments for anxiety, depression, relationship problems, grief, adjustment problems, traumatic stress, and phase-of-life transitions. And as part of her neuropsychology practice, she integrates depth psychotherapy and cognitive rehabilitation for those recovering after traumatic brain injury. Dr. Broennimann holds a BA in Psychology from the University of California, Santa Cruz, and an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Palo Alto University. She is licensed by the California Board of Psychology and is a member of the American Psychological Association.
Clinical PsychologistYes! In fact, being single is the best time to find a way to be happy with yourself. Singlehood is a profoundly wonderful time for you to explore the things you care about. - QuestionIs it OK to be single forever?Allison Broennimann, PhDDr. Allison Broennimann is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with a private practice based in the San Francisco Bay Area providing psychotherapy and neuropsychology services. With over a decade of experience, Dr. Broennimann specializes in in-depth psychotherapy to provide solution-focused treatments for anxiety, depression, relationship problems, grief, adjustment problems, traumatic stress, and phase-of-life transitions. And as part of her neuropsychology practice, she integrates depth psychotherapy and cognitive rehabilitation for those recovering after traumatic brain injury. Dr. Broennimann holds a BA in Psychology from the University of California, Santa Cruz, and an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Palo Alto University. She is licensed by the California Board of Psychology and is a member of the American Psychological Association.
Clinical PsychologistAbsolutely, if that's something that you want, go for it. If you really don't want anything to do with a relationship, that's perfectly fine. You shouldn't do something you don't want to do just because you think you're supposed to.
Tips
- Value the things that you have, such as your creativity, your intelligence, your friends or your pet(s) as well as your newly-found independence.Thanks
- Remind yourself of the support you do have from friends and family, and don't think it is just you against the world. Your friends may be the ones that understand how you feel the most!Thanks
- Appreciate all the good things you have going for you, such as friends, family, and good health.Thanks
Warnings
- Be cautious about getting into a new relationship. If you do find yourself in a new relationship, make sure you're over your last relationship. It's not fair to the new person, and it’s certainly not fair to you.Thanks
- When flirting with others, be sure not to overdo it. Leading others on is so not attractive.Thanks
- If you are severely depressed because you are single, consider talking to a mental health professional. You may have depression or another medical condition that requires treatment.Thanks
Expert Interview
Thanks for reading our article! If you’d like to learn more about relationships, check out our in-depth interview with Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW.
References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/mindfulness-exercises/art-20046356
- ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/physicalactivity/basics/pa-health/index.htm
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/what-are-the-benefits-of-therapy
- ↑ Allison Broennimann, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 11 December 2020.
- ↑ http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/building-self-esteem-topic-overview
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
- ↑ http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20045374
- ↑ https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/the-power-of-positive-thinking
- ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/tips_for_keeping_a_gratitude_journal
- ↑ Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Psychotherapist. Expert Interview. 27 October 2021.
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/relationships/when-everyone-else-is-married-with-children
- ↑ Allison Broennimann, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 11 December 2020.
- ↑ https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2022/12/seeing-movies-alone-solo-date-in-public/672363/
- ↑ Allison Broennimann, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 11 December 2020.
- ↑ Jetten, J, Haslam, C, & Haslam, AS, (2012), The Social Cure: Identity, Health and Well-Being, ISBN 978-1848720213
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/single-at-heart/2019/06/is-it-true-that-single-women-with-no-kids-are-the-happiest#1
- ↑ https://womensenews.org/2011/10/media-view-single-women-laced-contradictions/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/high-octane-women/201108/the-hidden-health-hazards-toxic-relationships
- ↑ http://www.medicaldaily.com/single-life-6-scientifically-proven-perks-being-single-and-ready-mingle-306384
- ↑ https://health.usnews.com/wellness/mind/articles/2018-02-12/5-health-benefits-of-being-single
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
- ↑ Allison Broennimann, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 11 December 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
- ↑ Allison Broennimann, PhD. Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 11 December 2020.
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/not-born-yesterday/201308/whats-so-good-about-being-single
About This Article
To be single and happy, try to focus on yourself by taking classes, doing volunteer work, taking up a hobby, or anything else you might not have time to do if you’re in a relationship. Make time to pamper yourself regularly, whether you buy a new outfit you love or you just hang out listening to your favorite music in your bathrobe. If you’re feeling lonely, make plans with your family or friends, or join a club or a gym where you can make new friends, and always remember your self-worth is not tied to your relationship status. For more info from our Counselor co-author about how to surround yourself with encouraging people and be optimistic, keep reading!
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