How to Be Nice to a Girl over Text and Make Her Like You

You’ve met this awesome girl and just started texting her, but how can you be nice to her and get her interested in you? Texting isn’t much different than talking to someone in-person–just think of it like a virtual conversation. Sure, you don’t have the same social cues, but you can be sweet in similar ways! Here are some ways you can be nice to a girl over text.

1

Ask her about her day.

Let her know you care about what's going on in her life. There’s no better way of being nice than having a casual conversation. Text her in the middle of the day to see how she’s doing, or text her in the evening to learn about her day. Bonus points if you can throw in some details about the day she already told you about!
- “Hey! How’d your meeting at work go?👀”
- “How was your day?”
- “Did you get to go to that restaurant?”
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2

Compliment her.

Point out what you like about her.^{[1]XExpert SourceSuzanna Mathews
Dating & Relationship CoachExpert Interview. 18 August 2021.} Let her know you care by boosting her confidence with a friendly or flirty message. Think about what you like most about her and go from there. If she’s sent you a picture, compliment her smile or what she’s wearing!^{[2]XResearch source}
- “You always know exactly what to say.”
- “That smile just made my day.
- “This may sound cheesy, but you are a ray of sunshine.”

3

Make her laugh with a joke.

Be nice to her by lifting her spirits when she’s down. There are so many ways you can make her laugh in the texting world! Send her a silly meme or gif of her favorite animal being goofy. Find a corny joke or pun online that’ll make her giggle.
- “What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop🤣”
- “Do you like vegetables because I love you from my head tomatoes.”
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4

Get to know her by asking questions.

Finding out more about her shows that you care.^{[3]XExpert SourceSuzanna Mathews
Dating & Relationship CoachExpert Interview. 18 August 2021.} Get a positive conversation going by asking her questions about herself. If you don't know her well, steer clear of questions that are too personal. Here are some questions to get you started:^{[4]XResearch source}
- “What’s your favorite movie?”
- “What’s your dream vacation?
- “What’s your favorite meme?”

5

Remember when she has an important event.

The nicest thing you can do is pay attention. Make an effort to remember what she has going on in her life.^{[5]XResearch source} Does she have an important job interview coming up? A test? A vacation she’s been counting down the days till? Remember these life events to ask about later, or, better yet, text her on the day they are happening.
- “Good luck on the final! You’re going to do great!👍🏽”
- “Have fun on your trip! Can’t wait to hear all about it😀”
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6

Console her if she's upset.

One of the nicest things you can do is be there for her when she needs it most. Give her a shoulder to lean on when she tells you she’s had a bad day or is going through a rough time. Your support will mean the world to her.^{[6]XResearch source}
- “I’m here whenever you need to talk.”
- “I wish I could be there to give you a hug.”
- “Tomorrow is a new day, and I’ll be here to help you through it.”
- “That sucks big time. Need to vent?”

7

Let her know you're thinking about her.

Send a message or photo that shows she's on your mind. Maybe you’re out with friends and see something that reminds you of her, or maybe you’re doing something you wish she was there to see. Take a picture and send it to her.
- “Saw this and thought of you🙂”
- “Bet you wouldn’t try this🤪”
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8

Play a game together over text.

Have some fun and make her smile with a little game.^{[7]XExpert SourceSuzanna Mathews
Dating & Relationship CoachExpert Interview. 18 August 2021.} Sometimes all a girl wants is for someone to hang out with her, so create a virtual hangout with some games. Ask her if she wants to play one of these games the next time you text:^{[8]XResearch source}
- Emoji Translation: Send a long list of emojis that tell a story and see if she can crack the code.
- Word Unscramble: Pick a word and see how many words she can make using that word. Switch roles and see who can get the highest score!
- Name that Tune: Text her a lyric from a song and see if she can name it. Have her send you a lyric and keep it going until you both get bored.
- Write a Story: You write the first sentence, send it to her, and she adds on to the story with the next sentence. Keep going until you finish the story.

9

Be yourself.

The most important thing you can do is to just be you. You are one awesome person, and she’d be silly to not see that! Text her like you would talk to her in real life. Send her memes that reflect your personality. Show her everything that makes you you!
- The last thing you want to do is catfish her. Give her your 100% authentic self.
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10

Send her a good morning text.

Start her day on a high note with a simple “hello.” A good morning text can be whatever you want it to be! Use it as a friendly way to brighten her morning, or add in a subtle flirt to leave her blushing.^{[9]XResearch source}
- “Good morning! I hope you have a great day😊”
- “Am I the only one who had a dream about us last night?”

11

Send her a good night text.

Help her smile after a long day with a casual message. Ask her about her day by keeping it casual or sauce things up a bit. Let her know you’re there for her by being the last person she talks to.^{[10]XResearch source}
- “Good night! Hopefully tomorrow will be better.”
- “Night! Can’t wait to see you in my dreams😉”
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12

Text her at an appropriate time.

Find out when she’s free and text her then. If you know she works or goes to school, try not texting her until she’s free. This way you can both have a good, long conversation that won’t interrupt anything. This is a nice way to respect her boundaries.
- Ask her about her schedule and when is the best time to text her.
- If she texts you back saying it’s a bad time, remember that for the next time you text her.

13

Respond in a timely manner.

Leaving her waiting for a response can come off as rude, and you don’t want that! If you can, try responding to her texts right away or as soon as possible. This will show her that you’re a nice person who doesn’t play mind games.^{[11]XResearch source}
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14

Be patient while waiting for her response.

She’s probably a very busy girl, so don’t blow up her phone. One of the nicest things you can do with her through texting is to not bombard her with messages. If she doesn’t text you back right away, don’t panic! She may be busy with something else and will text you back when she can.
- Send a follow up text if she hasn’t responded after a few days like “Hey! Hope you’re doing okay!” or “I’m not sure if you got my last text, and just wanted to say hey.”
- If she tells you she’s busy, give her the benefit of the doubt. A nice thing you can do is believe what she says.^{[12]XResearch source}

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What should I text a girl after rejection?
Suzanna Mathews
Dating & Relationship Coach
Suzanna Mathews is a Dating and Relationship Coach and the Founder of The Date Maven. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in creating mindset tools, social strategies, and digital strategies that help her clients elevate dating and deepen connections. Suzanna holds a BA in Communications from Bethel College, North Newton, and an MA in Theater and Dramatic Arts from Wichita State University.
Suzanna Mathews
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Answer
The response will usually depend if you'll ever have to see the girl again. Is she a co-worker or simply a random person you met? If it is someone that you do have to cross paths with again, remember to act like a grown up and respect the answer. Life goes on!
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