How to Avoid the "Cool Girl" Trope in Writing

The "Cool Girl" trope is commonly used in fiction. It is used to describe a female character who is "not like other girls" and is usually made to be seen as the "ideal girl".^{[1]XResearch source} Such characters are usually, but not always, written by men. This trope was confronted in the book and movie Gone Girl. Fortunately, falling into this pitfall isn't unavoidable.

Part 1

Part 1 of 4:

Doing Your Research

1
Look into the origin of the "Cool Girl" trope. This trope is most commonly used by male authors writing about a secondary female character, usually as a love interest for the protagonist. Despite being stripped of her femininity, she appears hot without trying.
- This trope was given a name and challenged in Gone Girl, a 2012 book by Gillian Flynn, later made into a movie which included a monologue calling out the "Cool Girl" trope by saying, "They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be."^{[2]XResearch source}
2
Understand the traits of a "Cool Girl". A "Cool Girl" usually has stereotypically male interests, such as food, sports, gaming, and drinking beer. She is usually laid-back and never stresses about anything.^{[3]XResearch source} Other traits include being "effortlessly beautiful", fun, spontaneous, getting along easily with her significant other's family, has an open-minded approach to sex, and is useful around the house.^{[4]XResearch source} The "Cool Girl" will also usually have the same interests as the author or the main character. She is usually seen as being different or better than other girls.
- A "Cool Girl" will usually not have an arc during the story. They are usually just there for their love interest.
- Whilst a "Cool Girl" is usually masculine, this is not the defining trait of "Cool Girls". A "Cool Girl" is a female character whose personality is a reflection of their male love interest's.
  - The movie Gone Girl mentions, "It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics."^{[7]XResearch source}
- This is not to say that the character can't have any of these traits, but they shouldn't have all of them.
The "Cool Girl" trope is not to be confused with the "Manic Pixie Dream Girl" trope. A "Manic Pixie Dream Girl" is an eccentric, bubbly female character with lots of quirks.^{[5]XResearch source} She is usually used as a catalyst for the male protagonist's change.^{[6]XResearch source} Like the "Cool Girl", she does not have a character arc and is merely used as a prop for the male protagonist.
3
Understand why it is problematic. Whilst there is nothing wrong with having a female character who fits some of the criteria, it can create an impossible standard. The "Cool Girl" is usually a male fantasy and can put pressure onto women to behave in a certain way to make them more appealing to men. This can pit them against each other, and can imply that you are only valid if you have masculine traits and interests.^{[8]XResearch source}
- "Cool Girls" are usually seen as loving food, yet never gaining weight and always being stick thin. This can cause body image issues in some people.^{[10]XResearch source}
- Consider your audience. Younger people can be especially impressionable. Consider the message they will be taking away from the story.
- The "Cool Girl" trope can convince people that there really are females who are exactly the same as a male partner instead of all being individuals.^{[11]XResearch source}
- The trope also goes hand-in-hand with the hyper-feminine female stereotype, making out that whatever females are doing, they are doing it to impress men, or get their attention, which is untrue.
Such characters may also not complain about casual misogyny and usually are anti-feminist. They may also doubt other women's allegations of rape or violence.^{[9]XResearch source}
4
Get to know some women personally. Whether or not you are female yourself, gaining some extra insight is always a good idea. Read experiences online relevant to the character's involvement to the story. The male and female experience can sometimes be very different. For example, if the female character has epilepsy, read about the experience of epileptic females, or if the character is the manager of a restaurant, read about what it is like being a female manager. You may be surprised.
- Don't be afraid to interview people about their experiences; this is a great way to gain extra insight.
5
Understand different stereotypes about females. Knowing what stereotypes exist can help you prevent creating overly-stereotyped characters. A lot of the time women are pit against each other because of certain stereotypes. Gaining an understanding of these stereotypes can help you avoid comparing your main character to others in a negative way. Common stereotypes about women include:^{[12]XResearch source}^{[13]XResearch source}
- They are sex objects.
- They should homemakers or caretakers.
- They are always dramatic and catty.
- They are bad at sports and gaming.
- They only care about physical appearance.
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Part 2

Part 2 of 4:

Creating a Convincing Character

1
Make the character an individual. Make the character three-dimensional instead of an object. Give her her own likes and dislikes, opinions, and her own personality. It is okay to have your character have similarities with other characters, male or female, but avoid giving her exactly the same personality as another character.
- Sometimes the character will be almost exactly the same as her love interest, to be seen as the "ideal girl". In reality, every single person on earth has their own interests, even if they do overlap with other people's.
- Give your female character just as much depth as you would give to your male characters.
2
Give the character feminine traits as well as masculine traits. Avoid making the character "100% tomboy" or "100% girly girl". Gender expression exists on a spectrum and every person, regardless of gender, will have masculine and feminine traits. It is possible for a character to enjoy getting their nails done and enjoy playing football at the same time.
- Show that femininity doesn't have to be degrading. A character can still be feminine whilst being successful.
3
Have the female characters stand up for themselves and others. Instead of having them tearing down other females, have them support each other. The "Cool Girl" usually makes fun of other females and will side with men. They usually aren't offended by misogynistic jokes. They might also be the one to accuse women of lying about claims of rape, violence or sexism. This can imply that women are unable to stand up for themselves or that they won't be liked by men for calling out sexism.
- Don't be afraid to have the character identify as a feminist and stand up for gender equality.
- Allow the character to speak her mind. Usually the "Cool Girl" doesn't speak her mind as all her thoughts reflect the male's thoughts.^{[14]XResearch source}
Tip: Don't be afraid to show your character's political opinion. The "Cool Girl" usually doesn't seem to have any political opinions, in order to not be seen as "problematic".
4
Include the character being emotional. Even the most laid-back of people get angry or stressed at some points. The character may especially experience mood swings as a teenager going through puberty, on her period, or going through a tough time in her life.
- Let your character experience vulnerability at some point in the story, whether or not she expresses it externally.
- An easy way to have a character show emotion is through physical reactions. This may be crying, holding their breath, shouting, shaking or laughing.^{[15]XResearch source} Understanding body language can help with this. Everyone has different body language, so observe other people's body language and how they react physically to things.
- Slow down emotional scenes. You can do this by highlighting small details and showing your character's thoughts.^{[16]XResearch source}
5
Make the character relatable. When characters have something the audience can relate to, they instantly become more likeable. Observe people's actions and what traits they have. You can add these characteristics to your character. You could also observe yourself, and add some of your traits to the character.
- It is okay to base a character off a real person in fiction, as long as you don't make them an exact double.
- Consider the character's fears. This can add a lot of relatability to them.
- Be careful about self-inserts (adding yourself or someone representing you into the story), they can usually end up being a Mary Sue. Give them their flaws like you would with any other character.
- Adding humour can make a character easier to connect with. Whether this is self-deprecating humour, sarcasm, or anything else.^{[17]XResearch source}
6
Don't feel you have to give your character a male love interest. Your character could have a same-sex love interest, or no love interest at all. Even if you do give your character a love interest, regardless of their gender, let her be an individual and have a life outside of her partner.
- Giving your character a male lover is totally okay, but not necessary in all stories.
- Try to avoid forcing a relationship onto a character. Some characters may not be suited for a relationship or a romance might not fit into the story. If that's the case, let the character be single.
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Part 3

Part 3 of 4:

Avoiding Common Pitfalls

1
Have the character contribute something to the story. Sometimes female characters only exists as an accessory for the male character. No matter how big or small, have the character contribute to the story. It might be that she phones the emergency services saves her friend's life, or that she sets two of her friends on a date.
- Consider what would happen if the character was taken away from the story. Would it still work without her? If so, it is likely she doesn't contribute to the plot in any way.
2
Avoid using the phrase "not like other girls". This can imply that there is something wrong with "other girls". It can also reinforce negative stereotypes. Also avoid generalising all females by using phrases such as "typical girl" or "normal girl".
- Instead of having the character being "not like other girls", acknowledge that every person is different and shouldn't be held against each other.
- If you do need to add that phrase into the story, have it be made a point of at some point, instead of letting it fly under the radar.
- An exception to this would be if the character is a transgender male. In that case, they aren't like other girls because they are not a girl!
3
Have a wide array of female characters with diverse interests and personalities. Try to include diversity in your story. This can show that all females are different but all equally valid. Give each character strengths and struggles.
- You can include characters of different races, genders, sexualities, nationalities, and religions. You can also include disabled and trans characters.
  - When writing diversity, write them as a person, not as their identity. In other words, don't make their race, sexuality, etc. the most important thing about them.
- Sometimes fictional works contain a lack of female characters. This means that the ones that do exist have to represent all females, therefore having to be perfect so they don't reflect poorly on women as a whole. Including more female characters means that each character can have imperfections and doesn't have to be good at everything.
Tip: Some people try to make their story pass the Bechdel Test. All that is required is to have two named female characters have a conversation with each other about something other than a male.
4
Don't focus on your character's looks too much, unless it's relevant. "Cool Girls" are attractive with little to no effort put in, but their natural beauty is always made a point of. Try to avoid commenting on your character's looks if it doesn't add anything. Usually, describing a character's looks can help the reader picture them in their head, however don't go on about their looks more than you need to.
- Don't feel you have to create a stereotypically "good looking" character. You can have a character who doesn't meet society's beauty standards.
- Break the narrow rules of beauty by showing that someone can still be beautiful with frizzy hair, freckles, curves, etc. Try to make the characters' appearances diverse.
- Try to avoid objectifying characters in your story by describing them as "sexy" and using words like "petite" or "bosomy". This shrinks your character down to a sex object.
- Don't let characters get away with casual sexual harassment. Make it clear that it's wrong.
- Have characters comment on something the character can control, such as her makeup, or her clothes.
5
Have women read over your work and share their opinion. Even if you are a woman, other people may have different perspectives. If there is a certain part you are unsure of, ask about it.
- Or course, you can also have men read over the work. They have different experiences, but can still bring a valuable eye to your work.
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Part 4

Part 4 of 4:

Using Character Development

Character development is an important part of storytelling. You can start off with a character who considers herself to be "not like other girls" before realising having feminine interests are okay.

1
Don't feel you have to change her interests. Your character may still be into sports by the end of the book, and that's okay. Instead of ridding your character of her masculine traits, have her realise it's okay to have her own opinions and interests.
- You can have your character develop by being an individual. She may learn that she doesn't have to echo other's opinions and can be herself.
2
Let your character have insecurities. All people have insecurities about themselves. This can be something about her personality, appearance or talents. The character may try to avoid or hide her insecurities, instead of facing it.^{[18]XResearch source} Show how the character copes with their insecurity.
- Insecurities can be side-by-side with flaws. For example, if the character avoids social interaction, this might be because of an insecurity. It also may be that their flaw is something they are insecure about, for example is she is overly-critical, she may be self-aware and be insecure about it.
- One of the easiest insecurities to include is insecurity about appearance. For example, they may be insecure about their weight, scars, birthmarks, race, hair or acne. Instead of having her physical characteristic disappear (for example, having a scar completely vanish is unrealistic), have her accept this part of herself.
- You can implicitly show the character's insecurity or insecurities by having them get defensive about it or by having them feel they have to "prove" something.^{[19]XResearch source} They may also idolise another character and try to copy them.
3
Give her flaws. Some flaws can be overcame by the end of the story, whilst some will stay beyond the book. Make the flaws something within the character's control.
- Characters without flaws are usually called Mary Sues.
- It is okay to give your character "attractive" flaws such as being clumsy, but don't make that their only flaw.
- Flaws come in different shapes and sizes. Nail-biting is an example of a flaw, but so is pyromania!^{[20]XResearch source}
Tip: If you are having trouble finding flaws, think of the seven deadly sins: lust, wrath, sloth, gluttony, envy, greed, and pride.
4
Introduce her personality from the start.^{[21]XResearch source} This way readers can understand her better. They can also be able to understand why a character is a certain way.
- If she says she is "not like other girls", give her a reason for being the way she is. Is she pressured into it? Did she have bad experience with a few other girls? Has she simply seen too many American high school dramas?
- Give your character a backstory. This makes their actions more understandable.
5
Have a turning point. If the main character experiences internalised misogyny, have someone or something make her change her mind about it. This does not mean making your character perfect at the end, it means showing how she has grown throughout the story.
- If she doesn't learn and grow throughout the story, show it. Usually stories without character development have an unhappy ending.
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What if one of the main protagonists has the same hobbies as her male friends because she only has male friends in her life?
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It doesn't really make sense for a character to have only the same hobbies as their friends - chances are good you have at least a few different interests and hobbies from your friends, even if you share a lot of them. And aside from that, men don't all have the same hobbies, either - and a lot of Cool Girls are counterparts to men who only have masculine hobbies, when men are entirely capable of liking cooking or fashion too. It sounds like your character might be relying on the male characters to have interests, which suggests she's underdeveloped. You might want to take a look at How to Write a Main Female Character and How to Create Strong Female Characters to learn how to better develop your character.
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Tips

Avoid relying on the Bechdel Test too religiously. It doesn't work for every piece of fiction and doesn't automatically make it "sexist" or "not sexist". Many other factors should be taken into account.^{[22]XResearch source}
- If the story is written from a male's perspective it is unlikely it will pass the Bechdel Test, so don't try to force it to pass by creating unnecessary dialogue.
- The Bechdel Test is easier used as a tool for movies, rather than books.
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Give your character a goal or something to aim for. This is a good way to show character development.
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Observe other books with good examples of female characters and take note of what they do right.
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